Storyboard: A Real Dawn of Despair A Tiny Toon Adventures Fanfiction by Leandro Martins Pinto, renebunny@hotmail.com November 04, 1998. Author Notes: After a couple of years in development, this story, now in trilogy format, is released. Once again, let me say thanks to my development team, who helped me with this text, and to HKUriah, who did the main revision and editing of this part 1, "A Real Dawn of Despair". Another little thing; I will assume that when the Road Runner, Little Beeper or Calamity Coyote says something that it is done via a handheld sign. Wile E. Coyote will use the voice he used in his cartoons with Bugs Bunny. Looney Tunes, Tiny Toon and Animaniacs characters (c) Warner Bros., Inc, a Time-Warner Company, and used without permission. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Buster stood next to Babs's rabbit hole, dressed in his tux, and waited. After whistling, 'Waiting for The Clock To Strike Three' for the umpteenth time, he called down into the hole, "C'mon, Babs! I told Bugs that we'd be at the Acme Multiplex before nine o'clock!" As soon as Buster said this, Babs jumped up out of the hole and loudy proclaimed, "I'm heeeeerrrrreeee!" She was wearing the same outfit that she wore to the Emmy broadcast after their run in with Dr. Gene Splicer. Buster smiled at her appreciatively before turning to the camera and saying, "Remember, Toonsters, one of the great advantages that Toon women have is the ability to be ready instantly if the need should arise." Babs ignored that comment. "Isn't it exciting, Buster?" she asked. "We're gonna see a preview of 'Space Jam!' Isn't it wonderful?" "It would be if we didn't have to do a technical analasys of the film for Monday morning," he replied dryly. "Don't be so negative, Buster," said Babs as she wrapped her arm around his elbow. "Come on, let's go," and they headed off to the Multiplex. It didn't take the bunnies long to reach their destination, and as they approached the Mulitplex's main entrance, they were greeted by the sight of a fairly typical movie sneek preview opening. Rotating floodlights lit up the area around the theater entrance, which was cordoned off to keep the crowd at bay. Mary Heartless from Entertoonment Tonight was busy interviewing the stars of the film, both the Toons and the NBA players, as they emergered from their limos to attend the screening. As each one of them arrived, they were greeted by thunderous applause. (All except for Daffy, who received the usual silence.) In other words, general chaos was the norm. Buster and Babs got a heathy round of applause themselves as they walked down the runway to the entrance, which was being guarded that night by none other than Arnold the Pit Bull. "Hiya, Arnold!" said Buster as he and Babs walked passed him. They had not taken more than a few steps though when Arnold stretched out his hand, and grabbing Buster by the ears, he pulled him back to the entrance and said, "Now you hold it right there, you puny leetle rabbit purrson!" "Arnold?" said Buster with irritation. "What are you doing? It's me, Buster! Why won't you let me in?" "Hear me know and see me next Thursday," said Arnold as he poked Buster in the stomach. "I know who you are, but that doesn't matter. No one gets by me without a ticket. Do you have one?" "Oh," said Buster sheepishly. "Yeah. I do," and he pulled both his and Babs's tickets out of his pocket and handed them to Arnold. "That's better," said the Pit Bull as he uncerimoniously dropped Buster to the ground. "Now go on you little namby-pamby bunny boy. Your girlfriend is waiting for you." Buster slowly stood up, and after straightening his jacket, he went back over to Babs, who had stood watching the whole exchange with her arms folded across her chest. "Problems?" she asked as she offered Buster her arm. "Nothing I can't handle, Babsy." said Buster with pride. "Oh really?" asked Babs with just a hint of sarcasm. "Uh-huh." Without saying another word, the bunnies made their way into the theatre to look for where the other Tiny Toons were sitting. This did not take very long, for almost as soon as they entered the room, they saw Fowlmouth jumping around in the seats. "Dadgumit!" they heard the volitile young rooster shout. "Why don't youse guys start this dadgum picture already? Why, I've got haffa dadgum mind to... Yeeeaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!" Fowlmouth's diatribe was cut off as a volly of lightening bolts zapped him. "Like, pipe down, Fowlmouth," said Shirley as the now singed rooster collapsed into his seat. As the crowd in the theatre burst into applause, Babs shook her head and said, "Well, there they are." "Yeah," said Buster. "Come on." With that, Buster and Babs went down to the row where their friends were seated. "Hiya, Buster," said Hamton, who was on the isle. "We saved saved a couple seats for you guys," and he pointed to a pair of empty chairs in the middle of the row. "Oui," said Fifi, who was sitting next to Hamton, "we deed not want for you to be, how you say, left out." "Thanks, Fifi," said Babs as she and Buster squeezed passed them. "You too, Hamton." "Hey, down in front!" yelled Monty from a couple of rows back as he beaned Buster with an empty paper cup. "Wouldn't you know it," muttered Buster as he sat down. "There's a bore in every audience." Then turing around to face his attacker, he said "Knock it off, Monty!" "Same to you, Buster," said Babs as she turned him back around to face the screen. "The movie's starting." They got through the movie without further incident, and once it was over, Buster, Babs, Plucky, Shirley, Hamton and Fifi stood together by the exit. "Great movie, non?" asked Fifi ask to no one in particular. Plucky meanwhile, was busy watching the credits. "What gives? I never saw the bit where I was sitting in the audience watching the game! I can't believe the camera never caught me! They must have edited me out! What an insult!" "Hmph," said Babs quietly to Buster. "Considering what a nuisance he made of himself during the filming, it's a wonder that they had anything other than a shot of him in an empty grandstand!" "Maybe that's why certain sections of the crowd seemed to be duplicates," suggeted Buster. Babs was about to agree when Hamton suddenly said, "Can we go to Winnie Burgers now? Going to the movies makes me hungry!" ########## Instead of going to Weenie Burgers, the gang made their way over to Shirley's, who had decided to throw an after the movie party. They'd been there for a while, and were having a great time, when Hamton suddenly remembered that he had left all of his homework assignments in his locker. "Oh no!" he said quite suddenly, "I gotta go to the Loo!" "What?" asked Buster. "You're gonna leave a great party like this just to go to the Loo?" "I have to Buster! All my homework is in my locker! Besides, I wanna get there while there's still a chance that someone will be there." Buster had to admit that Hamton had a point. "Well, okay. I'll see you later, pal." Hamton then quickly said goodnight to everyone else and headed off for the Looniversity. As he walked, he couldn't help but notice how dark and still it was. "Gee," he said to himself, "I don't know why, but this night is so... gloomy." Hamton thought he saw figures lurking in the shadows then, but before he could react, a familiar black Corvette pulled up to the curb beside him. "Hi, Hamton. Thay, what're you doing out at thith time of night?" "Oh, hi, Daffy," said Hamton as he stepped closer to the car. Taking out a handkerchief, he wiped the spittle off the open window frame before leaning against it and saying, "I'm just heading over to the Loo. I need to get some things from my locker." "Really? Well... I'm headin' for the Looniverthity mythelfth. Hop in. I'll even take you home when you're done." "Gee, thanks, Daffy," said Hamton as he opened the door and climed into the car. Pulling it shut, he added. "I appreciate this." "Don't mention it, kid," said Daffy, and the car headed off in the in the direction of Acme Looniversity, disappearing into the night. ########## Much later that evening, after everyone else had gone home, Fifi and Babs were helping Shirley clean up her house after the party. "What a party, huh, Feef?" said Babs. "Oui. Boot none of ze boys wanted to danze with me for very long. Ah wondair why?" "I dunno, Fifi," said Babs as she put another empty Acme Soda can into the trash bag. It was then that Shirley came in the room carrying three brooms, but before she could do anything with them, she abruptly stopped and fainted. "Shirley!" cried Babs with alarm as she rushed to her side. "What eez wrong weeth her, Babs??" asked Fifi as she too hurried to the fallen loon's side. "Shirley! Speak to me!" cried Babs. "Fifi, get me some water!" It took the purple skunkette only a few seconds to do this, but before she could give it to Babs, Shirley's eyes fluttered open, and she began to ramble incoherently. "Babs... Fifi... I can feel.... I feel... I..." "Well for goodness sakes, girl!" said Babs as she tried to shake some sense into the loon. "WHAT do you feel?" "A turmoil in the force... like, millions of souls screaming out in terror and then silence..." "Uh, Shirley, wrong quote." Witht that, Babs pulled a script out from behind her back and held in front of the Shirley's face. "See?" Shirley looked a bit confused. "Huh? Oh yeah, sorry. It's like... someting... something very bad is happening. It's totally evil, or some junk!" "But what could eet be?" asked Fifi. "I don't know," said Shirley as she stood up. "But whatever it is, it's not good." ########## Sitting on a nightstand next to a digital clock that read 4:42 AM, a phone was ringing. And ringing, and ringing. Finally, a somewhat groggy, beige colored bunny-ear picked the receiver off the hook and dropped on the head of rabbit that was sleeping next to her. That accomplished, the beige ear, and its owner, went back to sleep. "Uh, hello, er, I mean, what's up, Doc?" Bugs Bunny said as he groped around for the light switch. "Bugs? Foghorn speaking, boy. We've got some troubles, troubles I say, serious troubles here at Acme Loo. How fast can you get here?" "How? What?" Bugs shook his head to wake himself up. "Trouble? At five o'clock in the morning? On a Sunday?!? What's happened?" "Somebody, I say, somebody has burgulurized our facility, Bugs. And someone's been hurt awful bad. Can you believe that? How soon can you be here?" Foggy waited for Bugs to reply, but when there was none, he said, "Bugs? I said, 'How soon can you be here?' Hello? Hello? Bugs, are you there? On the phone, that is? Hello?" But Bugs was not there. He had zoomed out of his hole as soon as he had heard that someone had been hurt. ########## The tires on Bugs Bunny's Cadillac squealed as he brought the car to an abrupt stop in front of Acme Looniverity. As he got out of his car, he could see immediately that things were not right. Half a dozen Acme Acres Police cars were parked between the statues of himself and Daffy, and the main entrance was taped off with that infamous, "Police Line Do Not Cross" yellow tape. Several policetoons could be seen talking with Looniversity personel, and overhead a chopper had its searchlights turned on the edges of the forest. After seeing all this, Bugs headed for the Loo. The policetoon in charge let him pass, and didn't even bother to ask for identification. After all, everyone knew Bugs Bunny. Just as he started up the steps to the main entrance, the main doors flew open as a team of paramedics carried out Hamton on a stretcher, and they were followed closely by Sylvester and Porky. Bugs was shocked. In all his years, he had never seen a Toon as badly hurt as Hamton was. One of the paramedics was even holding onto an IV bottle as they carried him out. Looking to Porky and Sylvester, Bugs somehow managed to ask, "Wh-what happened here? How did Hamton get so badly hoit?" "We're not thure exthactly," said Sylvester. "One of the night janitorth found him like thith in the Computer Lab." "And theeuh-that's not all, Bugs," said Porky. "Whoever did this also steeuh, stoola, er uh took a whole bunch of comptuter disks that had impooorah, import-tah, confidah, special files on them." "What kinda files?" asked Bugs. "Thtudent records," said Sylvester, "payroll information, copieth of the thcripths of thome of the newer Warner Animation projecths, and a whole buncha other thtuff too. A complete litht is being put together for you." "Yeah," said Bugs as he watched the paramedics load Hamton's stretcher into the ambulance. "I'd like ta see dat." Bugs watched as two of the policetoons shut the ambulance's rear doors, and once they were closed, one of them slapped the door and called out, "All set, Henry! Go!" Bugs and the others continued to watch as the ambulance drove away, its siren fading away in the distance as it headed for Acme Acres General Hospital. Turning back to Sylvester then, he asked, "How is he?" "He's hurt bad, even for a Toon. But one of the paramedicth told me that, for the moment, his life'th not in any danger." "Has anybody told his parents what happend?" asked Bugs. "I'll deeuh do it," said Porky. "Hamton's my steuh-stoouh, sterr, my pupil. I'll head over and tell them now, and beh-bring them to the hospital." "Sure, Doc," said Bugs as Porky turned to leave. "You do dat. I'll take carea t'ings here. C'mon, Sylvester, I wanna take a look around inside." With that, the two Toons finally entered the Loo. After checking with the Lieutenant from the AAPD who was in charge of the investigation, they headed for the computer room to take a look at the area where Hamton was found. "Well it's about time ya got here, ya long eared galloot!" said Yosemite Sam as they entered the room. "Didn't I tell ya that these rowdy varmits'd destroy the place someday?" "Oh come on, Doc," said Bugs as he walked over to him, taking care not to step on the broken glass lying on the floor from the screen of a destroyed Macintosh computer. "You don't really think the kids did this, do ya?" "No," said Sam with a sigh, "I guess not. There was one heck of a fight here though. It looks to me like Hamton was tryin' t'git away from the burglers, and they cornered him in here." "And it looks to me like they were professionals," said Granny as she entered the room with Tweety perched on her shoulder. "They apparently knew exactly where they needed to go to get what they wanted. Rather efficient in a way," she said softly as she handed Bugs a sheet of paper. "Here's the complete list of what's been stolen, Bugs." "Granny?" asked Bugs with confusion as he took the paper. "What are you doin' here? I thought you was busy producin' da Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries." "Well what do you call this, Bugsy boy? I'm gonna start my investigation here and now. Tweety, go see if you can find anything suspicious in any of the other rooms." "Okay, Dwanny," said Tweety as he flew out the lab door. "Uh, sthay, Bugs," said Sylvester then. "Can you handle things here? I'd like to check out thome thingth too," and he hurried out the door to follow Tweety. As Sylvester left, Elmer Fudd came in, carrying a cellular phone. "Uh, hewwo, Bugs. I guess you know all about what's going on?" "I sure do, Doc," replied Bugs. "This is a bigger mess than all them hunting season signs Daffy and I used swap around on ya." "I agwee. Say, speaking of Daffy, have you seen him anywhere? We've been wooking for him for hours and haven't been able to find him. Do you know where he is?" "Gee, I dunno, Doc. He didn't tell me nothin' special, and you know how he like's to advertise what he's doin'. Didja try his car phone?" "No wuck there either," said Elmer, "but I'll keep twying." Elmer paused for moment then before adding, "Oh, we should go over to the Wecords Woom. Some things were taken from there too. "Okay, Doc, let's go," and the two Toons left the Lab and headed over to the Records Room. When they get there, they found Tweety walking by the cabinets, and a cop writing some things in a notebook. The cabinet that contained the tapes of important Looniversity information had been broken into, but not everything in it had been stolen. Only those tapes that were of the utmost importance had been taken. "Wuckiwee we have copies of the stolwen tapes in the Film Vault," said Elmer. "But the weal pwobwem is the secwet data that's on the stolen ones." "But, Doc, those tapes are protected by codes. It'll be all but impossible to decode them to get to the data." "That may be twue, Bugs, but we can't wun the wisk. Besides, whoever stole the tapes has pwobabwy got some way to decode them, even if it does take them a while." Bugs nodded with resignation as he realized that Elmer had a point. Looking over his shoulder at them, he asked, "What about da computers?" "They seem to be all wight, " said Elmer. "But we're checking them for viruses and such just to be safe." Before Bugs could comment on that, Sam burst into the room. He looked furious, and when he opened his mouth, he left no doubt about it. "Hey, ya long eared galloot! We got more trouble! Apparently the studios at Warner Animation in Burbank were burglerized too!" "What?" asked Elmer. "How?" "Ah don't know," said Sam with disgust. I called to tell them about what happened here, and they told me that they got hit too. Fortunately, no one there got hurt though." "Oh great," said Bugs. "Everything's outta control. We're gonna have ta have a staff meetin' ta figure out what to do about this mess." "I agwee, Bugs. We've got to figure this out. The phones won't stop winging, faxes are pouring in, e-mail messages are pilling up, and even cawwyier pidgeons are bwinging in messages! Evwybody wants to know what's going on." "Well," said Bugs calmly, "the only way we're gonna figure that out is t'let da investigations continue. In the meantime, I'll set up da meetin'." Bugs took one last look at the mess, and with a shake of his head, left to make his preperations, Sam and Elmer following close behind. ########### Later that same morning, in the Acme Acres Desert, a cloud of smoke appeared on the horizon, moving at high speed along Interstate 23. The cloud passed by a sign that read "Acme Acres - 15 miles" so fast that it began to spin as they cloud itself left a trail of fire behind it in the road. However, the Road Runner (Passarus Acelleratus) wasn't running to Acme Looniversity, but away from it. "Little Beeper's call must have been important," he thought as he ran. "He said the info had to get to the Loo as quickly as possible." Moving as fast as he was, it wasn't long before the Road Runner could see Little Beeper in the distance. His student was standing by a rock by the side of the road near an interesection. Quickly traveling the remaining distance between them, the Road Runner came to an abrupt stop and looked at Little Beeper questioningly. "What's happened?" he asked. "What did you need me to see?" "I was on my way to Flowmouth's house when I found this. I called you right away, figuring it was important." Little Beeper led the Road Runner around the rock to show him what he had found. It was an abandoned black Corvette. The driver's door was hanging open, and the right side mudguards were all scraped up. The Road Runner thought there was something very familiar about the car, and then he noticed the licence plate; California plate number DFY-1937; Daffy Duck's car! A myraid of questions began to form in the Road Runner's mind. If this was Daffy's car, where was Daffy? For that matter, what is his car doing way out here? Is this somehow related to the incidents at the Loo? Pushing his questions aside, the Road Runner looked at Little Beeper and said, "I'm glad you called me. This is serious." Little Beeper looked back at him questioningly, the look on his face making it clear that he did not understand what was going on. "Where's Daffy?" he asked "And what's his car doing out here?" "Let's head back to Acme Loo. I'll explain everthing there." "Why wait?" asked Beeper? "Becasue we need to get there fast, and we can't run and hold up signs at the same time!" Having said that, the two roadrunners took off for Acme Acres, leaving their trademark trail of fire in their wake. ########### "Here," said Slyvester to Bugs as he came into the faculty lounge and handed him a strange object. "Take a look look at thith." Bugs took the object from Sylvester and examined it carefully. It was a small piece of metal, apparentily a smaller piece of something else, and it had some some codes written on it just beneath an odd looking S symbol. "Where'd ya find this?" asked Bugs as he gave it back to Sylvester. "Well, Tweety found it when he was running away from me and... Uh, never mind that, it's not important. Anyway, Granny and I did thome checking, and we don't have anything like anywhere here at the Looniverity. In fact, as far as we can tell, it wasn't even made by the Acme corporation." "Ya don't say," said Bugs thoughtully. "I wonder..." Bugs hesitated for a moment before walking over to a very special door in the back of the faculty lounge, he took off his glove and pressed his hand against a black panel next to it. Looking at Sylvester then, he added, "Let's check it out." Bugs waitied for Sylvester to place his hand against the panel like he had done before pushing a small red button just beneath it. "BUNNY, Bugs. CAT, Sylvester The," a soft computer voice said. "Identity recognized. Access granted," and the door swung silently open. Sylvester followed Bugs into the secret annex of the Faculty Louge. The room could have easily passed for a high tech war room with computer terminals, consoles, transparent panel maps, a large conference table, and a wall lined with cuckoododo clocks with the names of various world cities printed beneath them. "So what do ya think dis ting is?" asked Bugs as they entered the room. "Granny thinks it's a piece of the casing from an explosive detinator; we found it right by the destryoed cabinet. But, it doesn't seem to be from a normal explosive either. It may not have been made by Acme, but considering just how it did go off, it was definately some sort of... cartoon explosive." "But dat would mean dat da guys who burgalized da Loo would have to be Toons." "It does look that way, Bugs, but we need more evidence before we can even think of who it was. As the pair sat down at the conferece table, the intercom beeped. Bugs hit the acknowledge button, and the speaker immediately formed a mouth and said, "Bugs? It's Granny, and I've got some good news. Once of the surveylance cameras wasn't destroyed by the burglars. I'm bringing the tape right over." "Dat's great, Granny. Sylvester and I are waitin' for ya." Bugs flipped off the intercom then, and looking to Slyvester he said, Well, Doc, maybe we can get some of dat evidence you wanted from dat tape. At da least, it'll be somethin' ta work from." ########### The Road Runner and L'il Beeper ran onto the Acme Loo campus at top speed, coming to an abrupt stop in front of one of the policetoons. "Is Bugs Buuny here?" read the sign that the Road Runner held up for the officer to read. "I think he said that he was going to be in the Faculty Lounge," said the policetoon, and the Road Runner and Little Beeper instantly vanished in a burst of speed, leaving in sign with the word,"Thanks," printed on it spinning in the ground. ########### "Did you call the kids?" asked Sylvester. "They should probably know about all of this." "Yeah, dey should," agreed Bugs. "I'll call Buster an' ask him come over here with the others so I can tell them all about it" It was then that Granny arrived carrying her video tape. As she walked over to the VCR, she said, "This is the tape I told you about, Bugs. It's got a pretty good view of the corridor by the faculty entrance." With that, she put the tape in the VCR, and punched the play button. As everyone turned to the monitor to watch the tape, they saw the familiar WB shield and circles appear, but intead of the words, "Looney Tunes" or "Merrie Melodies" the words, "Surveylance Tape" appeared. "These are images of the corridor by the faculty entrance," said Granny as she adjusted the picture for everyone to see it. "Look dere," said Bugs as some unidentifiable figures appeared, "three somebodies in the corridor, and dere's a fourth one." "Do you see the other detail, Bugs?" asked Granny. "Yeek, the clock by da door dere; 10:45 PM. Is this all?" "No, there's more," said Granny as she fast forwarded the tape a bit and returned it to normal play as a what appeared to be a pig figure ran across the screen, followed by two others. "That could be Hamton," said Slyvester as he pointed at the screen. "It probably wasn't to much after this when they cornered him in the computer lab. "The image of the intruders is a bit clearer here," observed Bugs. "Granny, can you enhance dem any?" "I'll try, Bugs," said Granny, and she began to work the complex controls on the VCR to try and make the images of the intruders more clear. After a few seconds of adjusting, she shook her head and said, "That's the best I can do." Everyone looked again at the image on the screen, they still couldn't tell who the intrruders were, but they could tell what they were. "Toon ducks," said Bugs as he got up and walked over to the screen. Pointing at specific points in the image he said, "The body's format is characteristic of ducks, but... dese guys look a little strange, don'tcha think?" "Maybe they were animated by Kennedy," suggested Granny as she adjusted her glasses to take a better look at the images on the screen. "I don't think so," said Bugs thoughtfully. "It doesn't look like Kennedy stuff t'me. Is dere anything else on the da tape, Granny?" Granny started the tape up again, but after only a few seconds, the images vansied to be replaced by snowy static. "That's all there is," said Granny. "They must have found the camera on their way out." With that, she rewound the tape again froze it on the duck-images as the Road Runner and L'il Beeper came into the room. "Hey, Doc," said Bugs as look at the two speedy birds. "What's goin' on? It ain't like you to be late." "Sorry about that, Bugs," read the Road Runner's sign, "but I do have good reason. Little Beeper found Daffy's Corvette out in the desert," and through a series of signs he explained the whole story of how the car had been found. "Now that is strange," admtted Sylvester as a look of confusion formed on his face, "but how is this related to the Looniversity break in?" "I say, boys, I say, maybe I know," said Foghorn as he came into the room. "I was buying some donuts for the cops at the convenience store, you know, the one where one of our students has a part-time job. It's that young squirrel, Raquel, female squirrel, that is. You know who I mean?" "I know her," said Bugs "She's a student from the Tiny Toons supportin' cast." "Pardon me," said Granny. "But what does this have to do with anything?" "Well now I was just a-comin' to that. If'n you'd all be quiet I'd tell you about it. You see when I was gettin' the stuff for the cops, the donuts that is, I happened to mention Daffy in passing, and that girl laid a doozy on me. A shocker that is. She told me that late last night, Daffy stopped in at the store, and he was on his way here, to the Looniversity I mean, and that Hamton was with him. In other words they was both going over to the Loo, and came in here together." An uneasy silence filled the room as the meaning of Foggy's words began to sink in. After a long pause, the Road Runner help up a sign that said, "Maybe that explains why I found this under the seat in Daffy's car," and he stretched out his wing and dropped a small empty plastic box on the table with the words, "ACME DIGITAL DATA STORAGE" written on it. Almost immediately, everyone in the room started thinking the same thing. Was is possible? Could Daffy somehow be responsible for all of this? Why would he want to rob the Looniversity? Even more so, how could he be responsible for the attempt to kill Hamton? Quite suddenly everyone started to voice their thoughts at once, offering explanations, arguments, and questions. Everyone but Bugs, who continued to silently stare at the duck images on the TV screen. "No..." said Bugs quietly as everyone else continued to babble at each other. "No..." he said again as he once more examined the remains of the detonator that Tweety had found. He looked again at the S symbol. This time, given the better lighting in the war room, he could now see quite clearly that the S was a kind of manufactures logo, and that it was not an S at all, but a dollar sign. "Ducks," he thought. "Dollar signs. Now I get it." "It ain't just Daffy, folks," he said aloud, and everyone stopped talking to look at him. "Nope," he said. "Not just Daffy," and he threw down the detonator with disgust. "It's the folks from Disney too!" Having nothing else to say, Bugs again turned and stared at the screen, focusing his attention at the Duck images upon it. ############### "Hello?" said Babs's Mom as she answered the phone. "Madame Bunny? Bonjour. Alllowez me to introduze myself. Ah am Pepe Le Pew." "Oh!" Babs mother said. Then before doing anything else, and even though he was only on the phone with her, she took a quick look at a nearby mirror to make sure that there wasn't a white stripe painted on her back. Not seeing one, she put the phone back to her ear and said, "Good morning, Mr. Le Pew. Now, don't tell me, let me guess. My daughter impersonated you during French class, right? I'm gonna have to have a long talk with that little bunny and..." "Non, non," said Pepe quickly. "Zat eez not why Ah called. Moi would just like to know if perhaps Buster is here with your daughter. Bugs Bunny has tried calling Buster at his place, but zhere was no answer. We thought that he might be here with Babs." "Buster? Well now I suppose it is possible. Wait a minute, I'll go see. There are just so many bunnies here that you never know who is and who isn't." With that, Mrs. Bunny went through the burrow to look for Buster and Babs. Pepe could hear her calling out their names over the phone, but her voice was soon lost to the din of the hundreds of little rabbits that lived there. After a few seconds though, he was pleased to hear Buster speaking to him. "Hi, Pepe," said Buster. "What's up?" "Bonjour, Buster," said Pepe. "Bugs and moi have been looking for you. We need you back at Acme Loo, and bring Babs and all your friends with you, oui?" "Sure, Pepe. Is something wrong?" he asked as he twisted his shoulder sideways because Babs kept trying to put her own ear to the phone as well. "Well... Eet would be betair for us to talk here, Buster, with everyone else. Ah will see you soon. Au revoir." "So long, Pepe," said Buster, and he hung up the phone. "What is it, Buster?" asked Babs. "He doesn't know about my impression of him, does he?" "No, I don't think so. He said Bugs wants to see all of us at the Loo right away. You go find the girls, and I'll round up the guys." "On a Sunday?" asked Babs as she made a dissapointned face. "It sounds serious, Babs. C'mon." With that, Buster took his girlfriend by the hand, and headed for the exit. ######### "He eez coming, Bugs," said Pepe as he retracted the antenna on his cel phone. "Finally," said Bugs as he hung up the other one. "I knew dat if he wasn't at his place dat he'd be dere. Is he bringin' the other guys?" "Oui, at least all of zem zat he can find." The two of them went over to the conference table then, where all of the major Looney Tunes were already seated, along with the executives from Warner Bros. and Time-Warner, who had come to Acme Acres for the meeting. Live action humans are not an uncommon sight in the toonivers. A stable interdimensional passage had been created decades before, and tourists are always visiting major toon cities. In this case however, these guys were not present for a recreational tour. "Is everybody here?" Bugs asked. As he sat down in his chair, he found himself thinking of the absurdity of their situation. Here were some of the greatest stars of animated cartoons, gathered in a room for a serious discussion about a possible conspiracy. It was like something out of an old episode of "Mission Impossible." 'What has happened to us?' thought Bugs. 'What happened to the innocence of the old days? "Good morning, gentlemen," said Cooper DaVille."You all probably know about the incidents at two of our facilities, WB Animation and here at Acme Looniversity. The purpose of this meeting is to see if we can figure out who is responsible for these actions, and to decide what course of action we will take to resolve this crisis." "Before we do that though," said Mr. Plotz, I'd like us to review what actually happened." "Eh, okay, Doc," said Bugs. "As near as we can tell, da boiglars here at Acme Loo, and probably at WB Animation, was a group of Disney characters, and that Daffy Duck was dere leader. At least, dat's what we think, based upon da evidence so far." The Warner executives looked at one another uncomfortably upon hearing that. To them, the idea of Daffy's treason was even more serious of a problem than the burglary was. "Do any of you have any idea why Daffy would do somthing like this?" asked DaVille. "Isn't it obvious, Mr. DaVille?" asked Dr. Scratchensniff, who had come down from Burbank with Plotz for the meeting. "Daffy is that way. You don't needs to be a psycyatrist to notice zee only zing zat Daffy thinks about, his own ego. He always needs more position, more power, and more glory. He is always valking on zee edge, and now he has gone over it, becasue ve can no longer fullfill his desires. Vhat ve have here is not good enough for him, so he made up zis plan with zee Disney people so zat they vould accept him into zere organization. "But fer what, Scratchy?" asked Bugs. "Sure, we all know dat Daffy can be an arrogant egomaniac, and he's always wanted my position here as number one toon. But everybody knows dat, and Daffy ain't never even denied it. Still, why would he wanna give up his number two slot here to become an anonymous number 50 or 60 at Disney? Especailly now with all da stuff he got ta do in Space Jam. I mean, 'Trademark and Copyright of Warner Bros' was one of his lines in da gym scene. And he's gotten some good roles in da new shorts dat were makin'. It don't make no sense!" "But he is a duck, Bugs, said Elmer. "Maybe he thinks Disney is better for ducks than Warner is the wong wun." "I don't thsee kidths wearing thailor haths at Walt Disney World, Elmer," countered Sylvester. "Justht hatths with mouthe ears. How is that a better thituathion for duckth?" "I, more than anyone here, agree about the lack of logic to be found in Daffy's attitudes," said Wile E. as he joined the discussion. "But we need to admit to the fact of his dessertion as a reality, if for no other reason than our own security." "In dat case, we need ta consider another fact," said Bugs."If Daffy just wanted to quit and go ta Disney, so he coulda just left and been done with it. In fact, why would he seemingly go out of his way to make it clear that he was betraying us? He coulda been a lot more careful. He knows about da survailance system. He wouldn'ta left his Corvette where it coulda been so easily found. He'd never let himself be seen goin' to da Loonivoisity, and most of all, he'd never be a part of what does guys did ta Hamton. Dat's what just don't make no sense." "I must concur with you, Bugs," said Wile E. in agreement. "In my opinion, "said Dr. Scratchensiff, "he prepared all of zhese contradictions as something to show to Disney, so zat he could seem to arrive zhere in triumph. It vill be like a dream for Daffy. Maybe he vants to show ze Disney people zhat he has no fear about challenging us, or in faceing us." "And this will all be very convenient for them, won't it? asked Plotz nervously. "One of the greatest Looney Tunes wants to join in the big happy Disney family. This'll make for great headlins in the Acme Acres Gazette or The Ducksburg Post!" "By the way," interjected DaVille, "what would make Hamton want to come the the Looniversity so late at night?" "Moi talked weeth Porky at le hospital," said Pepe. "He is zhere with Hamton's parents. He told moi zat Hamton was at a party zee kids where having at Shirley's place, and that he left early to come back here to get the homework he had left in his lockair." "I see," said Mr. Plotz. "So Daffy gave Hamton a ride?" "That's right," said Foggy. "We know that's what happened because the student at the convence story told us so. Confirmed it, that is. Well we need to do something," said Mr. Plotz. "We've got to find Daffy and the stolen files, wherever they are, and figure out why the Disney people would do something like this. Anyone have any suggestions?" he asked as he looked around teh table. "They're probably in Duckburg," said Sylvester as he looked at a map of the surrounding area. "The equipement used in the burglary was manufactured by the McDuck Corporation." "Hmmmm..." said Wile E. thoughtfully as he tried to analize the situation. "Comic books. They're very experienced with that type of thing. We really don't have anyone as familiar with it as they are, except of course the DC Comics people, but their expertese is in a differnt venue from what we would need. "And we can't go there ourthelvth," said Sylvester. "We'd attract to much attention, even if we did thstay dithguithed. Bethideth, all of our thchedualth are full with doing promothioth for Sthpath Jam. If we were to all dithappear, people would geth thuthpithuth. Daffy'th abthenth with be bad enough. Imagine the problemth we'd have with more of uth mithing." "Okay, fine," said DaVille. "So we need to send somebody else. How about the Warners?" "Yakko, Vakko und Dot?" said Dr. Scrathensniff with alarm. "How vould ve keep zhem under control for zee operation? They vould not be a... discreet... group, and ve need to avoid a open conflict. Besides, zey don't usually vork vell mit other characters, und teamvork vill be very important to zis mission." "We need ta send a Tiny Toons group." said Bugs with conviction, slapping his hand on the table for emphasis. "Dat's what we need to do!" "Why do you say that, Bugs?" asked Mr. Plotz. "Two reasons, Doc. Foist off all, they'd have the best chance of any of us to get into Duckburg unseen and accomplish da mission. More importantly though, dis *is* a Tiny Toons fanfic, so it has ta be dem." Bugs glanced slyly at the camera as he said this last part. "All right then," said Plotz, "so be it. Can you make sure they're ready for this?" "Now listen, son," said Foggy. "Of course, I say, of course we can get them ready. They're good kids, you know. Really good. Very good, in fact. They'll be ready. "Good," said Plotz with a nod. "You have my authorization to try it. Oh, by the way, there's something else I've thought of. We can only keep this a secret for a very short time; a few days at the most. We can't run the risk of accustions of trying to cover it up, and we won't try to. "You're right," said Bugs. "So, we'll just have to prepare the kids to woik fast on dis. But let's make da most of the time we do have. For as long as we can keep it a secret, the codename for dis operation will be... STORYBOARD." Bugs paused for just a moment then, and looking to his fellow toons, he added, "All right, let's get started on our preperations. I'll go talk with da kids." "Good luck, Bugs," said Plotz. "Thanks, doc. Well, I think dat's that's all, folks. Meetin' ajoined." As everyone else left to take care of what they had to do, Bugs remained seated and looked around the room at the picures on the walls. One of them was photo of himself, Daffy, and Friz Freleng that was taken during the production of "A Star is Bored." 'How serious did you take all dem cartoons, Daffy?' thought the rabbit. 'Maybe I'll never know.' Bugs continued to stare at the picture until he noticed that Foghorn Leghorn was standing beside him in the otherwise empty room. "Eh, what's up, Doc?" he asked, but there was no spirit in the question. "Well, I want to say, I mean, well, you seem a little tense, Bugs. Uptight, that is. Well, we all are, what with all this confusion, but you seem to be more than the rest of us. Tense, I mean." "Yeah, Doc," said Bugs as he kept looking at the pictures on the wall, "I guess I still think dat we're misin' somthin' in all of dis. Something that we ain't noticed, but I'm gonna figure out what it is. I don't know how or where, but I will." Bugs spoke with conviction as he said this, never once taking his eyes off of the pictures on the wall. ######### The door to the Cafeteria flew open and in walked Babs Bunny, followed by the rest of the girls from Acme Loo. Sweetie, who was sitting on Mary Melody's shouder, smiled when she saw Furballl, knowing that he would be unable to come after her, as he was too busy trying to stay away from Elmyra, who was chasing him. "C'mere, my cute little kitty witty," she squealed as she chased the cat. "Oh, you're finally here," said Buster, who had been talking with Plucky as he walked towards her. "Tell me, did any of you see Hamton anywhere? Plucky told me couldn;t find him, and nobody is answering the phone at his house." "Who, me?" asked Babs. "I found the girls, but I didn't even see Hamton. I thought you were gonna find him, Buster." you was call for he, Buster." "Well, yeah," agreed Buster. But..." Buster was cut off as Furball ran between his legs, closely followed by Elmyra. "comeback, Kitty-witty!" she cried as she ran after him. "Uh, as I was saying," said Buster after a few seconds, "I couldn't find him, or even his folks. It's kinda strange." "Have vous seen Bugs?" asked Fifi. "Ah am wondering where he eez." "I saw him before," said Buster as he sat down at one of the tables, "but only very quickly." He picked up a carrot and added, "There was a lot of confusion going on the Faculty Louge. He asked for us wait here, he wants to talk with us." "Like, I still have that bad feeling, Babs," said Shirley as she stood behind Babs. Her expression was apprehensive. "Take it easy, Shirl," said Babs. "It's probably nothing," she added in an attempt to calm the Loon down. As everyone else started to talk with each other, Buster suddenly remembered something. "Uhm, by the way, somebody oughta untie Monty. Looking at Babs with a sheepish grin on her face, he added, "We needed to be more, ah, persuasive, to convince him to come with us." "You you stupid razzafrazzin' rabbit!" he screamed once Dizzy had freed him from his bonds. Stomping over to Buster he yelled, "Do you really think that I'm gonna waste my time hanging around with you and..." Monty was cut off as the Cafeteria door again opened, and in walked Bugs Bunny, Pepe Le Pew, and Wile E. Coyote. They said nothing as they walked over to the Toonsters, who said hello to them as they approached. "Eh, good mornin' ta youse too, kids," said Bugs to them. "I suppose yer wonderin' why I've called yas all here on a Sunday. When they had all indicated that this was so, Pepe stepped forward, and after giving Bugs and Wile E. a quick glance, said, "Allow moi. You see, somezing tres serious happened here at le Looniverity last naight. Intruders broke eento zee studios at le WB Animation and here in also, taking important documents and records zat belong to us." The Toonsters were shocked to hear this, and gave Pepe their full attention. Even Elmyra and Furball froze in mid chase and started at the teachers to hear more. "WHAT?" they all cried together. "And that is not all," continued Wile E. "We have reason to believe that Toon from Disney are somehow responsible for all of this." "WHHAAT?" cried all of the Toonsters again, all of them looking aghast at the camera. "But dat ain't da most serious problem," said Bugs. "As far as we can tell, Daffy was in on it with the Disney folks. It even looks like he led da breakin. And, Hamton was hoit real bad because of it. "WHHHAAATTT???" cried all the Toonsters again, before they all fainted dead away in shock. "I told ya it wasn;t a good idea ta tell 'em dis way," said Bugs to his friends as they stood amidst the passed out Tiny Toons. ######## SPLASH! The water hit Babs square in the face, and she instantly jumped up and was jabbing her finger into his chest in anger. "LISTEN, blue- ears!" she shouted. "Didn't I tell you NEVER to get me wet again? "Whoa, Babs," said Buster defensively, "it wasn't me. Bugs is waking up everybody like that. See?" Babs looked over to see Bugs Bunny, dressed as a fireman, calmly waking everyone who had fainted up, with the aide of a firehose. "Oh, uh, heh heh. Sorry. Reflexes." sahe said feebly as she smiled at Buster, who still looked a little irked by her reaction. "Well den," said Bugs as he took off the fireman's suit and tossed it out of the frame, "now dat everyone is awake again, I t'ink we can continue. "I'll explain it all, but you gotta stay calm. "Like, CALM?" asked Shirley. "CALM? I knew that something totally serious and bad was going on, or some junk. How are we supposed to be, like, calm?" "Moi Hamton, hur... hurted? How?" said Fifi with obvious concern as she looked at Bugs and Pepe. "Where eez he? Moi moost zee heem!" "Do not worry, mademoiselle Fifi." said Pepe as he and Mary Melody moved to hold onto her to keep her calm. "Hamton's life eez non een dangair. Je will bring vous to le hospital to see heem, but fairst, leesten to what Bugs needs to say." With Fifi more or less under control, Bugs quickly filled them in on the rest of the details of what they had found at the Loo, what had happened to Hamton, and most of all why they thought Daffy was involved. "But, Bugs," said Babs when he was finished, and immediatly when into a spin change. She emerged from it looking very much like Dana Scully from the X Files. "This is insane! How could there come up with such a huge consipracy? And how could Daffy be behind it all?" In response to that question, Plucky suddenly jumped between Babs and Bugs and said with indignation, "Obviously this is yet another trumpt-up and absurd charge meant to demoralize my mentor! The very idea that Daffy would participate in a burglary of the Loo is ridiculous!" "Look, Plucky," said Buster to his friend, "I think that this time, Daffy made it very clear what his intensions where. He wanted to do this, there's not much room for doubt." "OF COURSE THERE'S ROOM FOR DOUBT!" shouted Plucky. Then, trying toa clam down just a but, he pointed his finger at Buster and the others and said, "Don't you remember what happened in Paris. All the evidence said he was guilty of stealing Bugs's Sloshcer, but he was innocent. Isn't anyone here, going to stand up for a falsely accused toon? Anyone?" Plucky looked at everyone pleadingly, but the only response he got was silence, broken only by the croaking of frogs and chirping of crickets. After a few seonds of that, Bugs stepped towards Plucky and said, "Plucky's right. I'm willing to give Daffy the benefit of the doubt. I give ya my woid on dat. We gotta figure out why he would want ta go over ta Disney in da foist place. Dere may be something here dat we don't know about that Daffy did. What I'm sayin is, we gotta get to da truth about all of dis. Dat's why I called all youse kids here in the foist place." The toonsters all looked at Bugs with suprise as he said that, but before any of them could ask what he meant, Pepe said, "Oui. We need continue our investigation, but to do zees, we weel need to infiltrate zee Disney studios. That will not be easy." Turning then to the Coyote beside him, he said, "Wile E?" Wile E. pulled out his Acme PDA and made a few calculations on it before saying, "The group that goes there will need to be highly skilled so that they can secretly infiltrate the Disney. They will be on their own, and the operation will likely be very dangerous. So, we need volunteers. Who want's to go?" ZIIIPPP! An enormous could of smoke filled the room, accompanied by the sound many running toons charging out of the cafeteria door. When it cleared, the only ones still there where Buster, Babs, Plucky, Shirley, Fifi and Calamity. Next to them was a giant plaque that read, "WE ARE AT THE HOSPITAL VISITING HAMTON IF YOU NEED US." Buster was suprised that the others were able to leave so quickly, and leave the plaque behind. "Not bad," muttered Bugs as he looked at the plaque. Then turning to the ones who had stayed, he said, "I'm proud of youse, kids. I guess we better get started." "I'd just like to know one thing," said Plucky as Wile E. entered their names into his PDA. "Why the heck do the writers always make us look so stupid in these 'asking for volunteers' scene?" Plucky looked angrily at the camera as he said this, which irised out on his face. ########## That afternoon, two cars pulled up to the Acme Acres Hospital. Bugs and Pepe decided it would be better to let the Toonsters see Hamton before going on the mission, especially Fifi, so they took them to the hospital to see him. Pepe parked his Renault close to the Hospital's main entrance, and he, Plucky, Shirley and Fifi waited for Bugs to park next to them. Once he had done so, he, Buster, Babs and Calamity all got out of the Cadillac, and they went all went into the hospital together. They rode the elevator up the floor where Hamton's room was, and just outside of it, they saw some of their friends with Hamton's family. Porky Pig was talking with Hamton's father Wade, and when he saw the others getting out of the elevator, he said, "Le-uh-let's go. Here they cee-uh-come." Porky and Wade went over to talk with Bugs as the Toonsters headed for Hamton's room. "Aren't you coming, Bugs?" asked Buster as he waited in the doorway to Hamton's room. "I'm be dere in a few minutes, Buster," said Bugs. "I wanna talk to Hamton's dad foist. Go on, I'll be dere soon." "Okay," said Buster, and he went into the room. Once he was gone, Wade Pig looked at Bugs and said, "How could all of this happen, Bugs? And why?" "Eh, we don't know yet, doc. But we's woikin' on it. How's Hamton? "He's unconcious, but the doctor's say he's out of danger. We can be thankfull for that at least," said Wade as he took his wife's hand and held it. "Yeah, dat is a relief," said Bugs as he took out a carrot. "Hamton's one of our best students." "Je thinks that when Hamton awakes, "said Pepe, "zat he will be able to tell us more about zee break in, no?" "You may be right, Pepe. But we'd better not push him. We can't put him under any more pressure. "Oui, Bugs, without a doubt." ########## The six Toonsters came into the room toghether, but they let Fifi get closer to the bed first. Seeing them come in, Hello Nurse got up out of her chair and said, "I'll let you be alone with him for a while, If you need anything, of if anything happes, call me," and she slowly walked out of the room. Buster, Plucky and Calamty all spun their heads around backwards to watch her leave, sighing with contentment as they did so. Babs, more than a little irritated by this, reached out and grabbed Plucky and Calmity's heads and forcefully pushed them towards Buster's head, which was between them. A sonorous BONK! filled the room, and the guys where lying on the floor with little nurses circling their heads they stared blankly upwards. "All, right, knock it off!" said Bugs angrilly as he came in the room. "Sorry, Bugs," said Babs sheepishly. Fifi was sitting next to the bed and looking sorrowfully at Hamton. Probes where attached to several parts of his body, and a bottle of medicine was connected to his arm by a long tube. He was also wrapped up in bandages, but his face was visible.She was thinking about how peaceful he looked. 'How could they do such a horrible thing to you, mon petite Peeg?' Fifi thought angrilly. "Hello, pal," said Buster, even though he knew that Hamton was unable to hear him. The six toons stayed by the side of the bed, looking around the room, thinking, and praying, when the unexpected happened. "Hello to you too, Buster!" Hamton said abruptely. "AHHH!" screamed everyone in startlement. Plucky eve jumped up into Shirley's arms, who angrily dropped the duck on the floor. "Gee, Hamton," said Babs as she caught her breath, "Are you trying to give us all a heart attack?" "Sorry, guys," said Hamton in a tired voice. "I guess that Fifi has the ability to wake up anyone," he added as he smiled at her. Then, to all of them, he said, "It was nice of you all to come and visit me." "Oh c'mon, Hamton ole' buddy," said Plucky when he heard him say that, "did you really think that we wouldn't come and see you? How else could we find out who was responsible for all this?" Plucky became more and more animated as he asked his questions, guesturing wildly as he did so. "Who do we make pay for it? Who do we take revenge on? Who get's into trouble when we do it?" "Like, Plucky! Stop with the mondo negatory vibrations!" said Shirley as she pulled her malajusted boyfriend away from Hamton's side. "Ohhh, mon petit potato du couch!" said Fifi as she gently laid a hand on Hamton's cheek. "Why deed zay do zees to vous?" "Fifi," said Hamton quietly as he took the skunkette's hand in his own, "will you remember me if I... If I gone?" "Non say this, mon amour..." said Fifi as she looked tenderly into his eyes. "I... I don't know if I... If I'm gonna make it, he said as he said softly, and he turned away from. "Do not worry about eet, mon petit peeg,? she said as she struck a brave posture, looking somewhat like Scarlet O'Hara. "I vow, by my own scent, zat we will find zee ones responzable for zis, no matter how hard eet will be, and at all costs!" As Fifi said this, a faint breeze came up to blow through Fifi's hair as dramatic music played and the lighting seemed to resemble a sunset. Suddenly, Buster jumped between them and said, "Hamton and Fifi, I'm proud to present to you this Emmy for Best-Scenes-of- Solidarity-and-Affection in an Animated-Series-Adapted-to- Fanfiction!" and he handed each of them one of the statues. "Oh! Merci, Buster!" said Fifi as she took her Emmy and hid it behind her back. "Yeah, thanks, Buster!" said Hamton in a perfectly healthy voice. "Now, where were we?" he asked. "Oh yeah!" he added, and switching back to his sick tones, he said, "Really, Fifi?" "Oui, mon amour..." and she gently laid a hand on his forehead, as both of them were in tears. "I'd just like to know if he's crying because of all the emotion in this room, or because the smell." said Plucky. This of course brought an immeditate, and violent, reaction from Shirley, who zapped the unlucky duck a good one. Just then, Bugs, Porky, Pepe and Hamton's parents came into the room, releived to see that he was starting to recuperate. Hamton told them all could remember of what had happened the night before. He told them how he had gone to Acme Loo with Daffy, but didn't see to much of him after they arrived because the Duck had to go to his office, and Hamton had to go to his locker. Near his locker, Hamton said he heard something that sounded like Daffy's voice, but it was a good way away. After that he said he had a vague recollection of the ducks in the Compter Lab, but after that, nothing at all. "Le voice of Daffy," asked Pepe, "was eet calling for you, Hamton, or was he talking to zomeone else? Can you remember?" "Well, Pepe..." Hamton paused almost immediately to catch he breath. He was still very tired, and just talking was wearing him out. "I couldn't underestand what he was saying," he began again. "It just sounded like his voice coming from the other end of the corridor. It sounded like he was giving some people some instructions or something." That statement casued Bugs to start thinking about some things. "Well, dat could be more evidence dat Daffy was involved with da break in, but it is also just coicumstantial again. I gotta get some more concrete facts. We've got to be sure of what happened when we do find Daffy." Bugs paused for a moment then as he considered what he knew, and what it might mean. After a few seconds, he looked at the others and said, "Youse kids better get home now. I wanna see yas all at da Loo in the mornin'. Come right to me office, we've got some special preperations ta make. "Okay, Bugs," said Buster. "Come on, guys, let's go. Hamton needs to get some rest too." Everyone said goodbye to Hamton and offered some final words of encouragement before slowly shuffling out of his room. The toonsters to go home and get some much needed rest, and Bugs and Pepe back to Acme Loo to get things ready for the morning. The camera focused in on Hamton's door as it closed, and then faded out. ########## The next morning, as Babs, Shirley and Fifi entered the Leon Schlesinger Gym at Acme Loo, they were suprised to see the boys there waiting for them, along with Foghorn Leghorm, who was wearing a baseball cap and holding a clipboard. "Wow," said Babs as she walked over to Buster, "you must of gotten up early today." Buster looked indigantly at Babs, and point his finger over at Foggy, he said, "Yeah, well, you would too if you had professor Leghorn outside your burrow, crowing at dawn!" Babs only smiled as Buster said that, and then she turned her attention to Wile E. Coyote, who had just entered the gym and was walking towards them. "Well, boys," he said matter of factly, "Professor Leghorn and I are here to get you ready for Operation Storyboard. We teach you what you need to know and get you ready to go there." "Will we be in a comic book story format when we get to Duckburg, Wile E.?" asked Buster. "You will all be in comic form the whole time that you are in the Disneyverse." Wile E. reached up over his head and pulled down a map of Duckburg and the surrounding area. However, it won't be as different from here as you think. For example, you won't be walking around with word and thought balloons over your heads. In fact you will still be animated, and should not sense any real differences. The only real difference is that that you will not have as much proficiancy as the Disney characters in performing the types of gags more suited to a comic book continuum than an animated one." "Like, what do you mean by gags more suited to a comic book?" aksed Shirley, who was intrigued with what Wile E. had said. "Perhaps 'situations' would be a be a better was to explain what I mean, Shirley. The comics in the Disneyverse don't make as much use of the absurd as we do, as such, situations there have a tendancy to be more like reality then they are here. Their use of nonsense is more limited, which means that dangers are much more serious. The possibility of death, for example, is very real. In spite of that though, like us, they do have a tremendous capacity to survive hard knocks, and even explosions, but the closer links between their continuum and reality does make the possibility of injury, or worse, a matter of serious concern." Calamity Coyote looked thoughtfully at his his mentor then, and held up a sign saying, "Couldn't that be an advantage to us? I mean the way that we can take take more blows and stuff without getting hurt?" "You seem to be very worried about zhis, non, Calamity?" Fifi asked as she smiled at the little coyote, who glared back at her with anger. "It will all depend on the situation that you are in at that particular moment," said Wile E. "As you know, even here the possibility exists of someone being killed. It's not easy, but it can happen. In the Disnetverse, it is much for of a possibility, so you might not be able to withstand something there that you could easilly survive here. For example, Foghorn, if you please?" Withhout any comment, Foggy cut loose the rope he was standing next to. As soon as he did so, everyone could hear a very familar sound, and Toonsters realized that they where suddenly standing in a familiar shadow. "Uh-oh..." the six of then said together as they guessed what was about to happen. *KLANG!!!* The huge anvil that had fallen on the Toonsters also made a rather large hole in the gym floor, which Foggy and Wile E. calmly walked over and peered down into it. "As you can see," said Wile E. quite calmly, "you are all still alive. But in the Disneyverse, this would have likely proved to have been fatal. As Wile E. so blithey explained this danger, the Toonster slowly and painfully climed up out of the hole. Calamity was the first to emerge, and he had little stars and comets circling around his head. He was followed by Fifi, who pulled up a dazed Shirley, and then the others, who looked just as stunned as the Loon was. "You had Foggy drop that anvil because you knew that if you did, it would have hit you, right?" Babs asked Wile E. as she swatted away the tiny birds that were circling around her head. "Of course, Babs," he replied. That was to show you that if the Disney toons try something like this, they will be able to hit you, unless you take steps to prevent it. Their attack will not fail just because of who they are." "It's a good thing that we know that," said Buster as he looked at the huge anvil shaped hole in the gymnasium floor. After a few seconds, he lookked back at Wile E. and asked, "So, ah, how about a descrpition of out mission? We need to know what we're supposed to do once we get there, where to go, what we... WHUP!" Buster's questions were suddenly cut off as Foghorn Leghorn hauled him up by the ears to talk at him nose to beak. "Now calm yourself son, take it easy, that is. Before you can do anything, get started I mean, y'all needs to prepare. Y'need to train, rigorously and completely. Work up a sweat, excersize. Make preperations. Condition yourselves, that is." "W-what do you mean by that?" asked Buster, with just a hint of nervousness. "Oh, you'll see, boy. Understand that is," and he looked conspiritorially over at Wile E., who only smiled back at him. ########## Early the next morning, with the inspiring theme from Chariots of Fire in the background, the six toonsters where running along Acme Beach, huffing and puffing with exertion as Foghorn Leghorn followed them on his bicycle, shouting at them thought a megaphone, "No pain, Ah say, no pain, no gain! Accomplishment, that is." ########## Calamity Coyote had been chasing Little Beeper for quite a while now. In fact, he realized that this particular pursuit had lasted longer than any previous one ever had. He made an adjustement to the scanner device mounted between the handlebars that was both keeping track of Little Beeper's movement, and piloting his fusion powered Acme Bike. It really was a rather efficiant set up, allowing him to concentrate fully on grabbing the tasty little roadrunner once he was close enough without also having to pay attention to driving the vehilce, thus avoiding a potentially serious disaster. As he got closer and closer to Little Beeper, he realized that all of the training that he had been undergoing for Operation Storyboard was also going to enable him to finally catch Little Beeper, and that, as far as Calamity was concerned, was great. Little Beeper look back over his shoulder, and realized with anger that Calamity was still there chasing him, and getting closer all the time. His mind raceing as fast as his legs, Little Beeper suddenly came upon a solution. As he approached a fork in the road that went around a huge boulder, he decided to take a page out of his mentor's book that should enable him to escape. With an extra burst of speed, that completely obscured him in a cloud of smoke as he ran, he chaged headlong at the boulder. Then, at the last possible second, the line of smoke that was speeding towards the boulder suddenly split in two and went around the boulder to rejoin on the other side of it. Calamity watched with dismay as he saw that happen. He knew that the tracking device he was using was only designed to track one roadrunner at a time. (After all, why would anyone need to track more than one?) Faced with there suddenly being two on the scanner would surely overload it. Sure enough, he looked down to see that the scanner had fallen into its RESET mode, which essentially shut it down. With a sigh he looked back up, and realized too late that he was about to crash into the boulder that Little Beeper had miraculously gone around. "Why me?" he thought as he closed his eyes and clenched his teeth in anticipation. CRRAASSSSHHH! Calamity slowly staggered away from the wreckage of his his bike as the camera faded out. ########## Wile E. Coyote and Plucky Duck where in a huge warehouse filled with rows upon rows of boxes stacked to the ceiling. "Now, Plucky," said Wile E. as he opened one of the boxes, "you are going to need to take a lot of equipment with you. You will need much more than you would in a normal situatuion. You should avoid even the possibility of a confrontation, but you must be prepared to fight if it is unavoidable. As such, you will need the following items." Wile E. turned to the box again, and began naming various items as he pulled them out of it and handed them to Plucky. "Let's see," he began. "Ah yes, here we are, a Smith & Wesson 5906 pistol, an HK MP5A3 submachine gun, an M-79 grenade launcher, a couple of Acme Claymore Mines, a bowie knife, kevlar underwear, ammuntion, spare magazines, bandoleres, LAW's rockets..." Wile E. paused for a moment as he rummaged through the box. "Let's see, what else..." "But... but... wait..." said a pair of legs with Plucky's voice that seemed to be holding up this mountan of paramillitary equipment, and that where wobbling in the knees. "Ah, here we are," said Wile E., and he started piling more things onto Plucky. "You'll need uniforms, tents, boots, flashlights, canteens, night vision goggles, walky talkies, notebooks, scuba diving equipment, laser sights for weapons, a rubber raft, a flare gun, a GPS tracking system, smoke bombs, microphones, detonators, sticks of dynamite, the current and complete Acme Home Products Catalog..." By now, the giant stack of equipment that Plucky was holding went all the way to the ceiling, and Wile E. only stopped adding to it when he saw Buster enter the warehouse and walk over to stand by Plucky. "I know I'm forgetting something," said Wile E. as he rubbed his chin pensively and looked at all the boxes in the room. "Something important. But what?" "Is this it?" asked Buster as he picked up a small metalic object that was lying on the floor by one of the boxes that Wile E. had gone through and lobbed it up at the top of the stack of equipment that Plucky was holding. Plucky watched in dismay as the object slowly arched upwards to the top of the stack. "Oh no" he said pitifully as the object gently landed on top of it all, which added just enough weight to to bring it all crashing down on top of Plucky head. "Oh of course, Buster," said Wile E. "Thank you. How could I forget the Acme Anvils? But, you'll need a bigger one then that tiny thing. You boys wait here, I'll be right back," and he headed over to the Acme Anvil factory. As the Coyote left them behind, Plucky finally managed to crawl out from under the equipment he had been holding. Glaring at Buster, he muttered, "You... you... You *bunny* you!" Buster only smiled at the camera. ########## Early the next morning, the six toonsters are running on the beach, in Alaska! Foggy is again behind them, but instead of riding his bike, he's riding in a sled, which is being pulled by the six half frozen, but still running, and very tired toons. "No pain, Ah say, no pain, no gain! You know, these are good kids," he mused as he watched them continue to run, in spite of their near exhaustion. ########## Fifi and Foghorn were alone in the Looniversity Gym. Fifi is all dressed like a ninja, armed with daggers, sabres and others ninja weapons. "Now pay attention, girl," said Foggy. "Pay attention, that is. You gotta climb that rope up to the catwalk and take on the four opponants that are waiting for you. But be careful! Beware, that is. They're good. Masters of a dozen differnent knds of martial arts. All of them, that is." "Oui, Professor Foghorn," said Fifi, not at all concerend about her enemies abilities. "Zis will be tres easy." As she climbed up the rope, Fifi was thinking about how easy it was going to be for her to take on her opponants. 'Eet eez probably zose stoopeed turtles' she thought. 'One blast of mah scent and zey weel be doone for!' "LE HIEEE AAAAAHHH!" screemed Fifi as she reached the top of the rope and jumped up onto the catwalk. Crouching into a combat stance, she quickly left off some blasts from her tail in every direction to take out her adversaries. Foghorn was looking looking at his stopwatch when suddenly heard the sounds of a scuffle from the cat walk and made a notation on his pad. Quite suddenly someone dropped Fifi off the catwalk to land in a heap at Foghorn's feet. She was all tied up, muzzled, her ninja outfit destroyed, and her weapons were tied to her tail. With a shake of his head, Foggy reached down and pulled the muzzle off of her face. "Le sigh!" she said when he had done so. "Vous deed not tell moi zat zee ninjas oop zhere where SKUNKS GIRLS on purpose, non?" ########## Buster was standing on an Acme Treadmill. He had electrodes pasted all over his body, and the Road Runner and Speedy Gonzales where observing him. "Time to test your speed capabilites," said the Road Runner. You might not be as fast as us, but you are a rabbit." "You got that right," said Buster with pride as he looked at the Road Runner. Looking then to Speedy, he added, "Any time you're ready." "Si, mi amigo," said the fastest mouse in all of Mexico. "Just remember, you asked for it! Arriba, Andale, Pronto! Eeeihaahhahaa!! shouted Speedy as he dashed over to the control panel for the treadmil and turned it on. Buster started running without much difficulty as Speedy slowly increased the speed of the treadmill to 15 miles per hour. "Not bad, huh?" asked Buster as he took it all in stride. "Time to make it more interesting," said the Road Runner to Speedy without answering Buster, and he turned up the speed control of few notches. Buster grunted in reply to sudden increase in speed, but he kept up the pace. "Pull the other lever, senor Road Runner," said Speedy as he pointed at the one marked, "INCLINATION ANGLE." "Gee!" huffed Buster, "I didn't notice how steep this thing was." The blue bunny was obviosuly straining now, but he wouldn't give up. The amount of inclanation on the treadmill slowly increased from 20 degrees, to 30, 35, 40, 45. Buster's legs now looked much like the Road Runner's at full speed, just a cirlcle of color beneath his body. The look of strain on Buster's face was clearly evident now, and the speed indicator was showing warp factor 6. "Hey," Buster somehow managed to gasp. "Can we slow it down a little?" With a wry smile, Speedy pulled on the controls again, and the inclination on the treadmil shot up to 65 degrees, and kept climbing to 70, 75, and finally 80. "Aiiiiii!" cried Buster as he finally lost his footing and fell down. Given the speed he was going, his skin instantly bonded to the treadmil surface, and he was whipped around the rollers at warp speed. "Hey! Stop this crazy thing!" he managed to shout. "Back off!" shouted Babs, who suddenly appeared, and who was dressed as Jane Jetson. "I'll handle this!" and with a flourish, she smashed the tredmill's controls to smithereens with a huge mallet. The treadmill itself quickly slowed to a stop, and completly liquified Buster ozzed off the machine to puddle at Babs's feet. "We need to work some more with this kid." said Speedy to the Road Runner. ########## Early the next morning in Monument Valley, Foghorn Leghorn, wearing an oversized cowboy hat, sat in the drivers seat of an old fashioned stagecoach, which was being pulled speedily along by the six toonsters, who where clearly on the verge of exhaustion, and where nearly melting under the heat of the sun. "No pain, Ah say, no pain no gain!" said Foggy as he popped open a can of Acme Cola, and the stagecoach was pulled across the prairie. ########## Pepe Le Pew and Shirley the Loon were in the the Looniversity cafeteria. "Vous will need a good food supply," said Pepe, who was wearing a chef's hat. "Zis is a sample of what vous will be taking weeth you," and he gestured at a lavishly set baquet table, complete with everything needed for a seven course meal, including all the *proper* untensils, dishes and glassware. "Like,this is mondo nice, or some junk," said Shirley as she looked at the table, and couldn't help but be impressed by how nicely it was set. "But, shouldn't we, like, take food that is more lightweight, and natural, or some junk?" "Well," said Pepe thoughtfull, "in zat case, you could take zees, non?" and he handed the blonde loon a box of Acme Millitary Feild Meal Packages, or A Rations. Shirley opened one of the boxes and saw that it contained a substance that looked something like a cross between meatloaf and dogfood. She took a tentative whiff of it, and regretted it instantly. Her face contorted in disgust, and her body took on a checkerboard pattern of illness. Suddenly, a whirlwind burst into the cafeteria and gobbled up the the entire banquet, including the table and A Rations. The whirlwind stopped then to reveal a slightly fatter looking Dizzy Devil, who was picking his teeth. "Uhmmm, good! A Rations! *BRRAAAAPP!!!!* The camera faded out on Pepe and Shirley, who were looking at Dizzy with amazement. ########## Bugs, Buster and Babs stood in the middle of a great hall that was completely empty and had white checkered lines painted on the wallks, ceiling and floor. "Well, kids, welocme to da 'Acme Looniversity Amuck Room'(TM)." said Bugs as he stood next to a large plaque with the room's name on it. "Dis room is da last woid in gags and trick generation. It was designed by me, Wile E, and da Development Team over at Acme Labs. Whattaya t'ink?" "It looks great, Bugs," said Babs. "But, uh, what's it for, and how does it work?" "Simple," said Bugs. "From now, on, dis room will be used for da testing of your toony abilities, the testing of new gags and scripts, and for general instruction on da basics of wild takes and such. An operator is in dat room up dere at da controls of a Cartoons Systems generator, which can create any kind of animated situation or environment dat he can think of." As he said that, Bugs pointed at a couple of windows on one of the walls near the ceiling that were flanked by two giant mechanical arms, one of which held a pencil, the other a paintbrush. Bugs waved up at the windows, and whoever was at the controls did something to turn on the arms, which moved to draw and paint a typical cartoon environment in just a few seconds. "Da main advantage of dis t'ing is dat we don't need to redo the animation of our own universe to make a specific scenario. We can do it here in a controlled enviroment with complete security, or well, what passes for security in a cartoon."" "Hey, this is cool, Bugs!" said Babs as she went into a spin change. Comeing out in a Starfleet uniform, she said, "Now we've got our own holodeck!" "Uh, right," said Bugs as he headed for the exit. "Okay, I'm gonna leave yas now. Yer program should start in justa few seconds." "Okay, Bugs," said Buster. "What are you gonna generate for us? Bugs stopped at he door and smiled at his two favorite students. "Me? Oh, I ain't stayin' at da controls dis time, Buster. Da student who provided most of da funding for da ALAR Project'll be running the controls fer da rest of yer trainin'. Good luck!" he said as he exit door slid opened. "Yer gonna need it," he muttered as he stepped out and the door ominously vanished. "Now why would he say that?" asked Babs. Suddenly the lights in the control room blinked on, revealing the operator. Buster and Babs both went into convulsive wild takes when they say who it was, Montanna Max, and he was grinning at them malenvolently. "Now this is what I call a good investment in education!" laughed Monty as Babs clutched at Buster and the two bunnies looked at him with obvious fear. "And this time, there's *nothing* you can do to stop me, because I'm just following the instructions of my teachers, which is to give you two a lesson, in *my* own version of 'Rabbit Rampage'!" Monty began to laugh evilly as he spun his chair back to the controls for the mechancial arms. The one with the pencil began to close in on Buster and Babs with a sinister brilliance. "We need to think of something, and quick, Babs," said Buster as he ducked away from the pencil. Babs appeared thoughtfull for a moment, then she looked at the camera giving the author of this fanfic a full screen shot of her cutest and most sweet look. "Now, you'd never let something bad happen to you favorite little bunny, would you? Hmmm? Please. Please." Babs eyes twinkled and her beautiful smile filled the screen. The author... startd to... er... gasp... this could be a very funny scene... but... well... gulp... fade out on Babs's face. Period. "You see, Buster, this stuff does't work just with you." "Gee, Babsy, that's true, but don't spread it," said Buster. "How can I say this? Seduction in the wrong hands... a dangerous weapon!" "Oh come on!" shouted Monty. "This just isn't fair!" ########## Early the next morning at a railroad station, several huge freight cars are being pulled along by... FOGHORN LEGHORN?!?!? "NO PAIN, WE SAY, NO PAIN, NO GAIN" screamed Babs, Fifi and Shirley down at him from the top of the first car while Plucky and Calamity walked beside him with huge malletts to make sure he kept pulled the train as Buster played "I've BeenWorking on the Railroad" on his banjo. "Now is this, I say, is this, OOF! any way to treat your coach?" and extremely tired Foghorn asked to the camera. Fade out as the train is pulled off into the distance. ########## Late in the afternoon, the toonsters were all heading home so they could rest up before heading for Duckburg in the morning. It was raining, and Buster and Babs stood under an umbrella at the Loo's main entrance. A few feet away, they could see a little green duck standing in front of the statue of Daffy at the Loo's main gate. An occasional flash illuminated the great statue as the little duck admiring it took some snapshots of it. "All of this must be hard on Plucky," said Babs to Buster. "Not know if that statue is always gonna be there, or what we're gonna have to do." Buster made no reply as the two bunnies walked over to Plucky, and as they got closer they could see that the rain did not seem to be bothering him. "Plucky..." Buster said to his friend. "Please, Buster, I'd like to be alone for a while. Okay?" asked Plucky as he turned to look at the bunnies. They both looked at him in silence for a few seconds watching the rain flow over his face. "We undestand, Plucky," said Buster at last. "If you need us, you know where to call." The rabbits bid him farewell then, and left Plucky alone with his thoughts as he continued to look at the statue. "Hmmm... " he said once they had gone. "I wonder how I'd look with black feathers?" he wondered aloud as he tried to picture his own face on the statue. He thought it would make a good replacement. Fade out on Plucky, standing in the shadow of the statue. Cue to the blank screen with the announcement: TO BE CONTINUITED... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------