Just something silly I put together as a kind of 'Christmas Special'...

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                      Ghost of Christmas Reruns
                            by Sean Campbell
                       finbarzapek@hotmail.com

	It seems to be a natural law that whenever a group of guys in their early twenties
get together over a few beers, the subject matter inevitably turns to that of the television
shows they enjoyed in their youth.
	Tonight was no exception, the conversation triggered in this case by a seemingly
innocent remark from Billy Thornton that The Muppets had been a lot better before Jim
Henson died.
	"You can clearly see the decline in quality from The Muppet Christmas Carol
onward," he proclaimed. "Those puppets have become nothing but mere shadows of their
former selves."
	There were three of us sitting around the table in Gleeson's Bar that night, Billy,
Thomas Richardson and myself. Spilt beer formed rims around the bases of our glasses
as drifting cigarette smoke from the table next to us clouded our vision. It was December
23rd, a twinkling Christmas tree taking up a large proportion of the far corner of the bar
as through smoked glass windows, falling snow could be faintly discerned against the
darkness of the night. There was a party in full swing just a small distance away from us
and we had to raise our voices in order to make our words distinct. "Don't be stupid!"
countered Thomas. "The Muppet Christmas Carol was the best movie of the lot! Gonzo
was great as Dickens, that rat too... what was his name?"
	"Rizzo," I said without looking up. "Yeah, that's right," replied Thomas. "Good
old Rizzo - looked a mess but I liked him anyway."
	"Although if you want my honest opinion," continued Billy with a slight hiccup,
"the Muppet Show was never as good as Fraggle Rock anyway. Now that was a great
show. Remember Wembley and Red, Uncle Travelling Matt and Sprocket? Great
characters all."
	"That's fighting talk," I laughed. "I know a guy who'd knock you flat if he heard
you say that Fraggle Rock was better than the Muppets."  We laughed for a few moments,
each of us taking the break in the conversation as a chance to take a brief sip of beer.
	As we did so, we became aware of the fact that we were being watched. There
was a tall man standing directly to the side of our table, a sly grin on his face as he
eavesdropped on our conversation. Dressed in a bright blue suit and with a black hat
perched awkwardly upon a sea of brown curly hair, he stared at us for a few moments
before smiling broadly. "Care if I join you?" he asked. His accent seemed unusual, not
quite local but at the same time not quite foreign.
	We glanced quickly amongst ourselves, unsure of the stranger and his ultra
friendly demeanour. "Um... sure I guess," said Thomas after Billy and myself failed to
reply. "The more the merrier I suppose."
	Smiling, the stranger took a seat at our table. "I couldn't help but overhear your
conversation," he said. "Nice to see a group of young men like yourselves who still
appreciate fine children's entertainment."
	He had unusually large blue eyes which seemed to twinkle brightly, his cheeks
holding within them a certain rosy red quality which gave them a slightly unnatural look.
"I've always been a fan of children's television myself," he continued. "Warner Brothers
animation in particular."
	"Ah, you mean Looney Tunes," said Billy. "I guess everyone likes them. You can't
beat the classics I suppose. Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck are the real Kings of comedy."
	"And the 90s shows too of course," continued the stranger. "Anyone remember
Tiny Toon Adventures?"
	Thomas suddenly smiled. "Tiny Toons?" he grinned. "Yeah, I remember it well. It
was one of my favourite shows when I was in school. It had a great theme tune, how did
it go again? Oh yes - 'We're Looney, we're toony, we're altogether'... something."
	The stranger laughed. "Well at least you got the tune right," he said. "Although I'd
take another look at those lyrics if I were you."
	"I remember it pretty well too," I exclaimed. "Let's see, the two bunnies were
called Buster and Babs. The duck was called Plucky. Then there was Hambone, Elvira,
Dizzy and... what was the skunk called? Fluffy?"
	"The pig was called Hamton, not Hambone," said Billy. "And the skunk was
called Fifi. And don't forget Dodo, or was it Gogo?"
	"It's Gogo," said the stranger. "And he can be a real nuisance at times!"
	"I remember one episode where the girls were stuck in a house in the woods," I
said. "And there was some kind of monster outside, a big thing with antlers on it's head."
	"One eyed Jack," smiled the stranger. "A nasty customer indeed! You wouldn't
believe how big he looked. Of course, in the end it turned out to be just Elmyra in a
fursuit."
	"Yeah, I remember that ending!" I continued. "And the bit where the blue cat
rolled out the door. Elmyra had him stuffed full of paper or something! Man, I wish I
could see that again." I laughed out loud, taking another sip from my glass.
	"And what about the one where Monty got turned into a rabbit?" said Thomas.
	"That was a great one too. One of my favourites."
	"Monty had it coming," said the stranger. "It was fun to watch. Just a pity we
couldn't leave him like that!"
	"There was one episode where they all had to make student films," said Billy.
"And I remember Dizzy's one - 'Dizzy Eat World'. Now that was bloody hilarious! I was
wheezing on the floor after that one."
	Thomas and myself nodded in agreement, laughing as we remembered the scene
in question.
	"And don't forget Shirley's film!" smiled the stranger. "17 hours long... now that
was a killer to watch! Even worse was that she arranged a screening of the full version
about a week later!"
	"I don't remember that one," I muttered.
	"Em... well, I assume she would have," said the stranger. He adjusted his hat and
smiled again, revealing a set of whiter than white teeth.
	"Remember the one where the old squirrel had the battle with the two movie
critics?" asked Billy. "There was a great scene where she had the lard sucked out of the
fat guy's guts."
	"That was an Animaniacs episode," I replied.
	"Are you sure?"
	Billy seemed confused.
	"I could have sworn it was Tiny Toons," he muttered. "I remember seeing that
duck Shirley in the same episode."
	"Oh, that was just a cameo," explained the stranger. "And not a very well paid
cameo either I might add. The Tiny Toons cast once considered strike action over those
cameos you know."
	Thomas burst out laughing. "Well I hope they had a better union than I've got!" he
smiled.
	"Oh don't mind Thomas," I said. "He's still sore because he was refused a raise
last week." I shoved Thomas backwards in a mock display of agression.
	"Hey - does anybody remember the one where the three girls went to a party in
Perfecto Prep?", asked Billy. "Babs, Fifi and Shirley all dressed up for the night! Trust
me, if you saw it you'd remember it."
	"Party in Perfecto?" I asked. "No, doesn't ring a bell."
	"Nor me," said Thomas. "I don't remember it at all."
	"Then why are you two gone bright red in the face then?" asked Billy with a sly
grin.
	The Stranger burst out laughing, his head held back. "I'm sure Babs, Feef and
Shirl would really appreciate that," he laughed. 
	We spent the next two hours discussing Tiny Toons and our memories of it, the
party next to us eventually running out of steam as the bar began to gradually empty.
	By midnight we were the only ones left except for the bar staff, and they were
clearly eager to get rid of us so they could go home. "Well," said Billy. "I guess I better
be hitting the road, work tomorrow."
	Behind us, the Christmas tree became darkened as the lights were switched off for
the night. "Me too," said Thomas. "My girlfriend will kill me for being out this late as it
is."
	We all clambered to our feet, heads swimming slightly in a mild sea of
drunkenness. All except the well dressed stranger that is, he'd been drinking carrot juice
all night.
	The four of us staggered out the door and into the cold night, feet crunching
through a good two inches of powdery snow. There were still some flakes falling, not
quite as heavy as they had been earlier on but persistent none the less. For the first time
in many years, it looked as if we would finally have a white Christmas to look forward to.
Billy and Thomas bid their farewells, shaking hands with our new found friend before
walking off into the night to try and find themselves a cab. I stood on the otherwise
deserted sidewalk with the stranger, both of us shivering in the cold as the bar was locked
up behind us.
	"Your not getting a cab home?" he asked me.
	"No, I live local," I replied. "Only takes me ten minutes to walk. You?"
	"Oh, I'm from slightly further away," he smiled. "Just visiting you might say."
	"Relatives?"
	"Well... some old friends."
	"You've got friends in the area?" I asked. "Tell me who they are, I might know
them."
	The stranger smiled, his white teeth flashing in the darkness. "Well, to tell you the
truth I actually came to see you, Billy and Thomas," he said. "I just wanted to see if you
still remembered me."
	"I don't understand," I replied.
	"Thank you," he continued. "It's nice to know that even after all these years, my
friends and I are still well remembered."
	As he spoke his eyes seemed to grow larger, a pair of blue fluffy ears sprouting
from his head.
	I stepped back in shock, blinking several times as I tried to figure out what I was
looking at.
	Before my eyes he grew shorter, blue suit vanishing and becoming well groomed
fur. Within moments there was no longer a man standing before me but a little blue
rabbit dressed in a red pullover. Buster Bunny!
	"Just a quick trip to reality to see if my old fans still cared," he smiled. "Thank
you my friend, thank you for not letting your childhood slip away." And with a gleam in
his eye he hopped away into the night.
	I stood alone on the sidewalk for several moments, holding one hand to the side
of my head in a combination of confusion and shock. Had I really just seen what I
thought I did?
	I stared into the darkness, following the line of bunny tracks that disappeared into
the gloom.
	But the cold December night refused to give up it's secrets. 
	
	
				The End