TINY TOON ADVENTURES DATE WITH DISASTER Fanfic by JON TURNER (FLOYDELTA@AOL.com) Starring BUSTER and BABS BUNNY (No Relation!) BRRRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGG!!!! The ending school bell rang at ACME Looniversity, signaling that another day at school was over. All the students scrambled to their lockers and packed up their materials and headed for home. Among these ecstatic students was Barbara Ann... "DON'T CALL ME THAT!!!!" Sorry, I mean Babs Bunny. "That's better!" Anyhow, as I was saying before I was so (rudely) interrupted, Babs was on her way to her locker, pausing a moment to glance briefly at Buster Bunny, her blue, true best friend (or should I say, boyfriend). This was no ordinary day. This was a Friday. And they had plans -read that, date plans- for the weekend. They were both looking forward to it. "Good afternoon, Babs Bunny," said a voice. Babs glanced around to see a handsome, good-looking rabbit about a year older than her giving her the eye. "Oh," Babs giggled, "Hiya, Radley Rabbit!" "I was wondering," Radley continued, "If you would care to go out to a movie with me this afternoon." As he spoke, he tried to pull her closer. "Sounds very sweet," Babs sighed, but then abruptly pushed away from him and continued walking on. "But, sorry, I can't, chap. I've already got a date with Buster." "Buster?!" Radley gasped. The sound of that name filled him with fury. "You've gotta be crazy! He's not date material, I am." "Well, I hate to burst your bubble," Babs remarked, "but I promised Buster. After all, a promise is a promise." "What is it that you see in that guy? And what kind of a boyfriend is he, anyway? He can't even do anything right around girls like you." "He makes me laugh," Babs replied, then added, "And besides, we've known each other our whole lives." Radley's face contorted with jealousy. He hated Buster Bunny. Buster was a nobody to him, a foolish, unloving, selfish blue eared rabbit. His jokes were annoying, according to Radley, that is. What is it that Babs saw in Buster, anyway? Why did she stay loyal to him? After all, hadn't Buster previously made disastrous decisions concerning Babs (Lying to her about where they were going, waiting until the last minute to ask her out to the Junior Prom, starting a water gun fight that turned into an adventure, daring her to leave Tiny Toons for thirteensomething)? That doesn't make Buster a funny bunny in this rabbit's opinion. Of course, Radley didn't have a sense of humor, so keep that in mind as you are reading this story. For those of you who want to know the reason why Radley was after Babs, here's a brief explanation of his character: Radley thought of himself as a righteous, perfect rabbit, and despised anyone who was not practically perfect. Buster was included. The only time he had ever seen Babs was in Romeo And Juliet. Babs' performance as the ill-fated lover Juliet had touched his heart, and since that was the only thing about the play that truly mesmerized him, he wanted to court her. You might think that he wouldn't be interested in her since she was far from righteous, but in truth, Radley thought that her little mind was being "filled" with nonsense from Buster. Anyway, to get back to the story, Buster Bunny was just packing away his belongings, (and completely unaware of what Radley was thinking of him) when suddenly he heard Radley's voice behind him: "Listen, Bust-er, you stay away from Babs. She is mine, and no one is going to take her away from me!" "What are you talking about??!" Buster asked. This guy was talking nonsense. True, Radley was a little more (and perhaps too much) serious and righteous than he was, but Babs would never consider him date-worthy material. "I will not allow you to get much closer to her," Radley threatened, "She doesn't really want you, anyway." "Only Babs can decide that," Buster responded. "Hah!" Radley laughed, "Women need a little bit of guidance these days." "Who says?" "I do," Radley said pompously, "I know what is right and what is wrong. And I must say it is wrong of you to fill Babs' mind with comedic jokes. How would you like it if I filled that head of yours with a bit of my own stuff!" "How 'bout I fill you up with a party, Buster-style?" Buster asked. "You wouldn't dare!" "Well then, lighten up!" Buster suggested. Then, he handed a firecracker to Radley. BOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!! The firecracker exploded in Radley's face, covering him with soot! Buster burst out laughing. "You think that's funny?!" Radley asked furiously. "Oh, it's a gag!" Buster chuckled. Radley grabbed Buster by the collar and glared at him threateningly. "I would think it's funny when I gag that petty throat of yours!" Buster stopped laughing, shocked at Radley's fury. "Where's your sense of humor? Can't ya even take a joke or two?" "Well," Radley was by this time, pretty much insulted, and close to bursting his "practically perfect" temper, "What kind of a boyfriend are you anyway? You don't even care about Babs! All you do is just get her involved in some little scheme, and then play a couple of dirty tricks on her. You lie, you cheat, you start water gun fights, you even try to bump her off!" Buster was getting irritated at Radley's accusations. He had done no such things out of malice. And besides, he had worked so hard to come up with the perfect date for him and Babs, and nothing was going to come inbetween it, especially not Radley. "Radley," Buster stared at him in the face, "Get a life. Get a humorous one." "I DO have a life!" Radley shouted, "The perfect life for me!" "Sure," Buster remarked sarcastically, "perfect for being a sourpuss!" "Hiya, Buster!" Babs had walked up to Buster. "Hi, Babs!" Buster resumed his cool posture, "Ready for the night of our life?" "You bet I am, laughing boy!" Babs gave him an affectionate nudge, "But I've got quite a few things to do first, such as, oh, homework, packing, and saying goodbye to my parents." Babs went on and on, until she finally said, "I'll see you tonight!" Then, she started to walk out, dreamy-eyed. Radley groaned. He knew that there was just no stopping Buster's plans. He would have to let it be for now. "Well," he said calmly to Buster, "I guess there's no stopping you from taking Babs on that date." "Thank you," Buster said politely, "I'm glad you understand that." "Pleasure is all mine," Radley lied, and he started out. Then he paused for a moment, then said, "Have a nice date! I truly hope nothing goes wrong!" "No problem!" Buster replied, "I've been working on this date for years, and I've been waiting to do this. Everything is well-planned. Nothing will go wrong!" Radley smiled wickedly as he walked out. * * * * * * Later that night, Buster was on his way to Babs' burrow, bringing along a bouquet of flowers. At the same time, Babs was just finishing up packing everything in her little, er, large, bag: clothes, bathing suits, dresses, lotions, comic books, music, her sense of humor, her talent for imitating other stars. "Now do be careful, Babs," Babs' mother lectured her daughter as soon as Buster had arrived, "And make sure Buster gets you home safely!" "Aw, don't worry about it," Babs reassured her mother, "Buster always gets us home in one piece, more or less. Besides, I'm sure he'll pull this date off." "You bet I will," Buster answered coolly, and he handed her the flowers. Babs sniffed them, "Oh, Buster! They're quite a catch, as far as flowers go!" She gave him a peck on the lips, which made Buster starry-eyed. "Have fun, kids!" Babs' mother said. "Shall we go, laughing boy?" Babs asked. "Gaaahhhh!" was all that Buster could say. "I'll take that as a yes," Babs answered. Then she dragged him out of her burrow and into the moonlight. * * * * * * Behind the bushes, someone was watching, someone who was jealous of a no account blue bunny dating a talented actress. "Yes, I sure hope nothing goes wrong!" he cackled to himself, and he dashed off. * * * * * * "So where are we going?" Babs asked. At this, Buster snapped himself back to attention. "Oh! We're taking a taxi to one of my favorite places where mother used to take me when I was little. Fun Fair!" "Oooh! Sounds like fun!" Babs loved amusement parks, particularly roller coasters. Scarcely had she said that, when suddenly, a bright yellow taxi pulled up. "There's our taxi, Buster!" Babs shouted, "Let's hit the road!" They both climbed aboard the taxi. The driver glanced at them, "Where to?" "To Funfair!" Both Buster and Babs said together. "Ditto!" said the driver. Before any of them knew it, the taxi went zooming across the countryside out of Acme Acres. "So long, Acme Acres!" Babs called out. Buster, surprisingly feeling green in the face (from how fast the taxi was going) just groaned. Babs glanced at Buster, annoyed. "Psst!" she whispered, "Your next line is 'Hello, adventure!'" "Hello, car-sickness?" Buster asked dryly. "Very funny," Babs commented, "You do look a little bit green." Babs opened up the window, grabbed Buster by the neck, and exposed his head to the outside air. "There!" she said, "Now you'll feel all better by just breathing the fresh air!" Buster did inhale the air, all right. But that didn't stop his illness. He took a look at the countryside whizzing right by him as in a blurry mess. "I think I'll look down," he thought. Buster looked down, and saw the lines of the street below him. "Do you see Fun Fair anywhere?" Babs asked. "All I see is," Buster remarked, "A line." As the street line went past him. "Thank you, Mr. Lookout," Babs said sarcastically. "And there's another line," Another line whizzed by Buster's eyes, "And a line, and a line, and a line," More lines went whizzing by Buster faster than he can keep track of them. "A line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line, a line..." By this time, Buster was talking SO fast, it was difficult to understand what he was saying. Babs yanked Buster back into the car. "Some sightseer you are!" Buster just groaned and lay on his side. Unbeknownst to them, the driver smiled wickedly. It was good enough that he made Buster sick from the ride, but things would really start to crack up once they arrived at Fun Fair. * * * * * * It was only an hour later when they arrived at Fun Fair. "All righty, Fun Fair!" said the driver. "YIPPPEE!!" Babs shouted. Buster sighed, relieved at last that the taxi ride from Hell (Sorry, I had to say that) was over at last. Babs grabbed Buster and started to drag him out of the car, when the driver stopped them. "Hold it right there, rabbits! Ya haven't paid me, yet! You owe me $555 for the ride." Buster groaned. He and Babs didn't have that kind of money. Besides, they needed it in order to have fun. They knew there was only one option: Bolt! "Ready?" Buster asked. "Go!" Babs answered. The two raced out of the taxi and headed straight toward the park. "HEY!" shouted the driver. "You haven't even paid me!!" * * * * * * Buster glanced around the park. It was as good as ever. All of his favorite rides were here: the haunted mansion, the log flume, the tunnel of love, the funhouse, the roller coaster. "Look! Funny Roller!" Babs called out, pointing to the roller-coaster. She grabbed Buster and yanked him towards the ride. Once they were on board, Buster explained, "I haven't been on this one in a long, long time. This has the fastest turns that are wackier than Wackyland!" "Wacky, huh?" Babs put on her best imitation of Gogo Dodo, a friend of theirs, "Oh-do-de-oh! Oh-do-de-oh!" Suddenly, the car began to move. Slowly at first, but then faster, and faster. And before one would even know it, the roller coaster was charging as fast as a Road Runner up and down the slopes, even upside down! Babs howled with excitement during the ride. Even Buster didn't feel so sick. Besides, car rides and roller coasters were a different subject altogether. Below in the control booth, the controller watched Buster and Babs riding on the coaster. "Heh, heh, heh!" he chuckled, "Now's my chance!" With that, he pushed a button. The car was charging on through an upside-down track, when suddenly, for no apparent reason that the riders knew of, the ride stopped! "Now what?" Babs asked. "I dunno, Babs," Buster answered, "This never happened before when I used to go there." "Hmmm," Babs thought, "Somethin' fishy is going on around here." "Yeah, although I don't exactly see any fish," Buster agreed, "I think I'll go talk to the control manager." He started to walk outÉ\ then he looked down. He was looking at the night sky. He looked up. He was looking at the roller-coaster ride and the ground far below him! "YIKES!" Buster grabbed a nearby pole and hung on for dear life, just before falling. "Help! Help!!" he cried, "I'm falling!" "Hmmm," thought Babs, "This looks like a job for..." she changed her clothes to that of a super hero, "SUPER BABS... Carrot cake!" Someone had handed Babs a carrot cake while she was busy babbling on. Indeed, that someone knew Babs' weakness, and was quick enough to abandon the control room and race up to the upside-down car. While Babs hungrily devoured the carrot cake, Buster continued shouting, "HELP! HELP!!!" But Babs didn't hear him. The only thing that mattered to her was the carrot cake. Finally, Buster lost his grip and went plummeting to the ground far below. Babs finished up the cake and said, "Now to help Buster?" She looked around. Buster was gone. "Buster? Buster? Where are you?" Suddenly the ride started up again, and zoomed all the way around the rest of the coaster until it reached the exit area. Babs climbed out, searching for Buster, when suddenly, she stepped on something. "OWWWW!" The 'something' groaned. Babs looked down. That 'something' was Buster, lying as flat as a pancake on the ground! "Havin' fun?" Babs asked. "Yeah," Buster answered dryly. * * * * * * "Well, after that rocking ride, I could definitely use a calmer one!" Babs said. "There's one!" Buster pointed to The Tunnel of Love. "Ahhh, l'amour!" Babs sighed, in her best French accent. They climbed aboard a boat, which slowly carried them through a tunnel, which was shaped like a heart. Inside the tunnel, romantic music was playing, and all sorts of fireflies were buzzing around them. It was really romantic. "They don't call this the Tunnel of Love for nothin'!" Babs remarked. "Nope," Buster replied, glancing around his surroundings, "They sure don't." Suddenly, both their eyes met. They moved a little bit closer, but just as they were about to kiss... "DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN!" The music in the tunnel had changed into loud, heavy metal, rock and roll jams. Buster groaned at this interruption. "It was never this LOUD at the Tunnel of Love!" "How do you know?" Babs asked, suddenly angry, "Who did you take along on this ride before?" "My mother," Buster answered honestly, "Who else?" Babs was relieved that Buster hadn't been dating someone else other than her. "And I thought," Babs said, changing her appearance (and voice) to Marilyn Monroe, "that it was someone prettier than little ol' me." "There's no one prettier than you, Babs," Buster explained, but as he spoke, the music got louder, and louder. "What?" Babs asked, "I can't hear you!" "THERE'S NO ONE PRETTIER THAN YOU, BABS!" Buster shouted, at the top of his lungs. And just like that, the music got even louder, so loud in fact, that Buster covered his rabbit ears. Babs had a better idea for tuning out such loud music. "If it's that bothering to you..." she held out two pairs of ear plugs and placed two of them in her rabbit ears. Buster took two of the ear plugs and stuck them in his ears, too. Behind the tunnel, someone was throwing a fit. Switching the music in the tunnel hadn't worked. But he knew something else would. He put on his scuba diving kit, took a screwdriver, and dove into the water. "Ahhhhh," Buster sighed, "That's much better!" "Now, where were we?" Babs asked, but then she suddenly remembered, "Oh, yes!" She glanced at Buster romantically. Buster hoped that nothing would go wrong this time. Slowly, their lips met in a passionate kiss. Then, suddenly, the boat sank into the water. When they arrived back at the dock, Babs helped Buster out onto the deck, "Well," Babs said, starry-eyed, and shaking off her wet fur, "That was quite a wet kiss!" "You can say that again," said Buster, who was all sopping wet. * * * * * * The 'someone' who had changed the music and sunk the boat in the Love Tunnel groaned. Nothing he did at the amusement park could separate them! But he had other ideas. * * * * * * Afterwards, Buster and Babs headed for the parking lot. "So now we're goin' to have dinner, huh?" Babs asked. "Yep," Buster answered, "At Lobster Beach." "Mmmmmmm..." Babs thought, and she put on a cook's hat, "It must be good enough to eat!" "But I hope we don't have to take another taxi," Buster added. "Well, why don't we get ourselves a car?" Babs suggested. "A CAR?!" Buster gasped, "Babsy, we're not old enough to get a car!" "You're not old enough," Babs answered proudly, then took out a driver's license, "But I am." "I thought you weren't allowed to get a license until you turn seventeen." "Well, I sorta had to stretch the truth a little," Babs admitted. Buster felt unsure. Babs drive a car? That's impossible! * * * * * * Someone was overhearing everything. He would be waiting for them at the Car Lot. * * * * * * At the Car Lot, Buster and Babs looked around for a good car. Finally, they found a Lamborghini, which, the sign said, was the fastest one in the world. "Let's take that one!" Babs suggested. "Hold it right there!" The Car Lot owner came up behind them, "That car costs $99,999!" Buster was about to protest when Babs stopped him, "We're only renting it." She took out a credit card she had burrowed from her mother. The owner looked at the card, then shoved it back into Babs' hands. "Credit cards are no good here. Either you pay the bills or forget it! Even if you're renting it, you still must pay the full price!" "I told ya it wasn't such a good idea, Babs," Buster said. "Hey," Babs snapped, "Finders, keepers! Let's go!" She grabbed Buster and yanked him into the Lamborghini. Then she started up the engine and drove out of the car lot, leaving the car owner behind. "HEY!" the car owner shouted out to them, "THAT'S THE SECOND TIME!" (Shouldn't that be the fourth time, Radley?) ("I MEANT WHEN THEY GET AWAY FROM ME!") (Sorry.) * * * * * * Babs calmly drove the steering wheel with her foot and glanced at Buster, "Look! No hands!" "Gee, and I thought you couldn't drive a car!" Buster remarked, "Sorry I didn't believe you." "I told ya I was good for somethin'!" Babs answered. The countryside was very quiet. At last, nothing seemed to be going wrong. Buster hoped that it would stay that way for the trip, for he was disappointed that not everything had worked out for them as they had hoped. He had spent a long time trying to prepare for it, and if things went wrong again, this date would collapse like a house of cards. Babs didn't care. She was having a fun time! She liked it when it was romantic, but she also enjoyed when things got crazy once in a while. ("Besides, it's a nice break from a typical date!") (Thank you, Babs. I'm glad you agree with me.) Babs moved a little bit closer to Buster, who was feeling a little bit blue, read that, sad. "Why so down, Buster?" "Oh, I dunno, Babsy," Buster sighed, "I just wish that there was something I could do to make this date better!" "Well, there is one thing you can do now," Babs suggested, moving a little bit closer, "Whisper sweet words of nothingness into my ears. By the way, do you like them better up or down?" "A motorcycle cop." "'A motorcycle cop' is what you consider sweet words of nothingness?!" "There's a motorcycle cop coming straight at us!" Buster wasn't joking. There really was a motorcycle cop coming right towards them! Babs slammed on the brakes, and the officer climbed off his cycle. "You know how fast you were driving down that road?" the Officer asked. "No," Babs answered. "REAL fast!" said the officer. He took out his checkbook and began writing a ticket. "Then I've got no choice but to give you a ticket! You owe me $555,999 for disobeying speed limits!" "We ain't got that kind of money," Babs answered. "Then, I have to give you a lecture!" said the officer. Babs groaned. She hated lectures. "Now you listen here!" the officer started, "Do not drive fast means just that, DO NOT DRIVE FAST! You got that? And furthermore... Blah, blah, blah, "It is extremely disrespectful to human law to disobey orders..." Blah, blah, blah, "You could hurt someone, ya know..." Blah, blah, blah, "Can't we make him stop?" asked Babs. She was getting bored during the lecture. Buster took out a hidden remote control. "Why not?" Babs snatched it from Buster. She aimed it at the officer and pressed a button. Instantly, the movements of the officer were much faster than before. His voice was now high-pitched (as high as Alvin And The Chipmunks). In addition, his words were sooooooo fast, it sounded just like gibberish: "Elamlkjpoityh;kajbs;k[iou[weOIHIOWE;LKN;KOakj;kj;lksj[pojkyjr;ke!" went the officer. "qwpeoirujhg;lkajs;vmkn.zmbvnwpoieur.[Oijg;lksadng.lmnv..." As the officer went on and on, Babs stepped on the gas, and they went zooming on and on across the countryside. "YEEE-HAWW!!" Babs shouted, like a cowgirl. Buster was all pressed up against his seat, and his eyes were getting dizzy all over again. It was just as bad as the taxi ride. "Do you really have to go this fast?" Buster asked. But Babs was having so much fun driving, that she didn't even hear Buster. Buster suddenly heard sirens. He looked around. The motorcycle cop was giving a chase, with several police cars behind them. "Babs! They're catching up to us!" shrieked Buster. "Who's catching up to us?" asked Babs. Buster pointed to the cops, "THEM!" Babs looked and knew that the situation was really bad. "Step on it, Babsy!" Buster cried. "On what?" Babs asked, "There's nothing underneath to step on!" "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!" screamed Buster. Babs giggled. "I know." She pressed down on the gas pedal even harder, and they went faster than before. Buster covered his eyes. Babs howled with excitement. And behind the car, smoke was pouring out in all directions, causing the police cops to suddenly start exploding into a coughing fit. On his motorcycle, the cop decided it was best to make a getaway. He couldn't wear his outfit forever, and he had to think of other ideas in order to catch those rabbits who kept on evading his schemes. Besides, he would get placed in jail if his true identity was revealed. Then, CRAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH!!!!!! The police cars slammed into one another, creating a traffic jam. In the commotion, the officer jumped off his motorcycle and kicked it aside. Once he was safely out of the policemen's sight, he threw off his outfit. "That does it! Now for my last effort!" The officer was really mad now. He was going to get Babs no matter what. * * * * * * Later, at the Lobster Beach... Babs and Buster sat on a log on the beach, listening to the waves beating. Around them, a band of lobsters were playing Hawaiian style music. (So that's why they named it Lobster Beach!) The music began to get up-beat, and jazzy. "Cool beat!" Babs placed on her sunglasses. Then, she spun around, and she was dressed like an luau dancer. "Come on, Buster! Let's luau!" Babs said. "But Babs, we've been through this. You know I can't..." Buster never finished his sentence. Babs grabbed him and began swaying him to the music. Dancing was NOT a thing that Buster was good at (he had proved that at the Junior Prom when he tried out some Bugs Bunny-style moves so that he could take Babs), but as long as Babs was with him, he didn't mind. None of them noticed a huge lobster coming up behind the musicians. He began to dance divinely, so divinely that some of the other lobsters joined in. Behind his large lobster costume, the one who was wearing it grinned. Now was his chance! He walked behind Buster, took out some salt, and started to sprinkle it all over Buster. Buster was so busy struggling to match Babs' moves, that he didn't even notice what Radley was doing. Then, suddenly, something pinched Buster's tail hard. It was the large lobster, who suddenly grabbed Babs and started to rock her to the music. Buster struggled to find Babs among the dancers. Unfortunately, he did not get far. A band of hungry lobsters were waiting for him. They charged at Buster and began leaping over him. Besides, rabbits with salt was a splendid idea for Lobster Dinner! Intrigued by the increasing hullaballoo, the band played faster, and faster. Buster was having more than his share of lobster problems. Lobsters were all over him! Babs didn't notice, for she was too busy having fun. She didn't realize who her partner was, she thought it was Buster. "Now that's more like it, Buster!" But then she looked again. It wasn't Buster at all. It was a giant lobster! "You're not Buster!" she gasped. The lobster tried to block her, but she went searching for him. She looked and finally found Buster. He was being bounced into the air by a large mob of lobsters. "Buster!" Babs cried out. Buster immediately glanced at Babs, and from the terrified look in his eyes, Babs knew she had to save him. Babs charged towards Buster, pushing at the lobsters. "Out of the way, claw-face!" she shouted, "Coming through! Gangway! Pardon me!" Buster was tossed high into the air. He realized he was really high above the ground. As he dropped, Buster screamed, as if it would be the last time. He squeezed his eyes shut as he prepared to meet the ground, and his doom. But then, suddenly, Buster felt rabbit arms! For a moment, he thought, "Am I dead?" Then, he looked up. "Gotcha!" said Babs. "Thanks," said Buster, grateful that Babs had caught him in her rabbit arms at the last minute. "I owe you a dance." "You bet ya do, Buster!" With that, Babs grabbed Buster and began rocking him again. Behind them, the big lobster disappeared behind a tree. Then, out from behind the tree, came a familiar blue rabbit wearing a red shirt, but no pants at all. "There!" said 'Buster', "Now no one will know the difference!" Still in Babs' arms, Buster had never felt more confident about dancing. He also felt delighted that as long as he was with Babs, those lobsters wouldn't bother him. While swaying to the music with Babs, Buster thought it probably might be a good opportunity to show off a new trick he had just discovered to impress her. "Babs," Buster said, "Check out what I can do!" He took hold of Babs' hand and spun her around. As Babs spun, she didn't see Buster accidentally fall backwards, thanks to a little trip by an intruder. Nor did she notice the intruder (who was wearing a Buster Bunny costume) coming towards her. Suddenly, Babs felt strong arms lock on to her. "Hey, nice trick Buster!" she told her partner, "Do it again!" "You bet I will!" said 'Buster', and, shockingly, he gave her a violent shove. Babs began spinning around really fast, so fast that she couldn't stop. Coming up right in front of her was a lobster serving punch. Babs tried to stop, but she couldn't... WHAAAMMMMMMM!!!! Together, Babs and the lobster crashed into each other, and the punch went spilling out of the bowl right onto Babs. Her face contorted with rage. Meanwhile, Buster was lost among a crowd of lobsters, completely unaware of what had just happened. The last thing he remembered, he was showing off his new dancing move to Babs, then the next thing he knew, he slipped. And when he had picked himself up, lobsters were all around him, again! Now that Babs was not with him, the lobsters found a perfect opportunity to catch their main course for dinner. "Oh no!" Buster shouted, "You are NOT going to get me!" "BUSTER!!!!" "I'm coming, Babs!" Buster shouted, but his way was blocked by a lobster. "Ooof!" Buster tried to get away, but the lobsters advanced on him. For a moment, Buster felt that he was going to die. He would have to find a way to get those lobsters off him. Finally, he noticed the ocean nearby. Buster immediately spun around, and took a giant leap into the air, higher and higher until he was as high as the moon. Then, SPLAAASSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!! Buster fell into the water hard, causing a huge wave to wash across the shore. The lobsters scattered at the sight of the wave. Babs hid behind a tree to avoid the wave, but it splashed onto her shirt. Her face turned a shade of night purple. "Wait 'til I get my hands on that rabbit!" she shouted. Once the water cleared, Buster was lying face down on the ground, gasping heavilly. The lobsters came close to him, but suddenly they held their claws over their noses and dashed away. Buster wondered why they didn't proceed to attack him, but then he soon found out why. The salt had completely washed off of him. The lobsters would definitely not want a raw rabbit with no salt for dinner! Relieved that his troubles were over, Buster picked himself up, only to find himself face to face with Babs. "Babs!" Buster gasped. He was horrified at her prescence. Her dress was spoiled, with punch stains smeared all over it. Her fur was completely wet from the wave. And she looked furious! "What happened to you?" "'What happened to me?'!" Babs snapped angrilly, "You know what happened to me, blue ears! You pushed me right into that punch carrier, and spoiled my dress!" "What?!" Buster asked, "How could I have possibly pushed you? I was just showing you my latest dancing technique when..." "Yeah," Babs interrupted him, "A real clumsy technique!" "But I didn't push you!" "Don't lie to me, Buster Bunny!" Babs snapped. "I'm not lying to you," Buster explained honestly, "I didn't ruin your dress, honestly I didn't! All I did was spin you around, and then I fell, and I was surrounded by lobsters, and I don't remember what happened after that." "Hardy, har har!" Babs laughed sarcastically, "Of course you remember! You then took a big swan dive into the water, and you got me all wet!" "Did I?!" Buster asked, horrified, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... I just wanted to get those lobsters off me." "What lobsters?" Babs asked, thinking that he was making this up. "'What lobsters?'!" Buster asked, "The ones that were all over me! For some reason, they thought I was tasty. Then, I realized I had salt all over me, so I had to wash it off!" But Babs didn't believe him, "That's a tall rabbit tale!" She held out her cottontail at Buster. "No!" Buster said, "It's not! I told you, I did not knock you into the punch holder. I know someone knocked me down! And I didn't mean to splash you, honest!" That was when Babs turned red. "That does it!" she shouted. "I'm going home!" As Babs started to walk away, Buster raced after her. "Babs! Come back! I didn't..." But Babs would not look at Buster, nor would she let him finish his sentence, "Absolutely not, Buster Bunny. I've had it! Every time you take me out somewhere, you mess things up!" "But I didn't mean to mess things up!" Buster begged, "Honest I didn't! I spent my whole life planning to make this date perfect for both of us! It's not my fault things went wrong, it's just that..." "It is JUST that," Babs shouted, "this date is ruined! You've really messed it up this time, Blue-Eared Freak!" "No!" Buster protested, "I didn't have anything to do with what happened tonight!" Babs just walked farther away from Buster, until she was out of sight. "Okay," Buster sighed sadly, "I take it back. I did mess it up. I'm sorry, Babs." Sadly, Buster turned and walked away. His date was spoiled, his best friend was gone, and worse, his carefully planned intentions had failed. "My whole life is wasted," he said to himself. "Well, I don't want to mess things up any further. I'll just go away forever." Meanwhile, Babs had walked quite far away from where Buster was. "'I didn't have anything to do with it' indeed!" Babs said angrilly, "That's the biggest lie he's ever told me!" But then, she stopped-right dead in her tracks. "Wait a minute. What am I saying? What am I thinking?" she asked herself, "Buster would never lie to me (not after 'Hare Raising Night' anyway). If he really didn't knock me into that punch carrier... Come to think of it, he wasn't even controlling the rides. He was with me. So, why am I blaming him? This doesn't seem fair! Something's not right here. Either I'm gonna have to face the facts, or this is a job for..." She spun around and redonned her Super Babs costume, "Super Babs!!?" Then, she looked again. "Whoops! Wrong costume!" She spun around again, and this time, she had a detective's hat on and a pipe, "Sherlock Babs,the world's greatest detective!" She turned to the cameraman. "Can we stop the film, please?" The film stopped. "Thank you, now why don't we replay the whole date from top to bottom- and make it fast, too!" So the film about what happened with Babs and Buster's date replayed. As it played, she looked closely at the various characters they had met on the journey. The taxi driver, the control booth man, the music changer, the car dealer, the police officer, the huge lobster... Then she noticed that the "lobster" had sprinkled salt all over Buster. "So he was covered with salt!" Babs realized, "No wonder he had to take a big splash! That means its true that he didn't intentionally splash me, and I accused him of intentionally getting me wet, I have to find Buster and apologize." But then she stopped herself, "Wait, I can't do that just yet. I have a case to close!" Then Babs started thinking about the taxi driver, the control booth man, the music changer, the car dealer, the police officer, and the huge lobster. "Hmmmm," she thought, "All these people seem to have one thing in connection, but what?" She looked at the faces again. All of them seemed similar, similar to that of a light brown hare with blue eyes. "Come to think of it, when Buster shoved me into the punch carrier, he did look kinda strange. I never thought he had blue eyes before..." Suddenly, she stopped, "Wait a minute, blue eyes??!" Babs looked again. Buster never had blue eyes before. He could never have them, unless... "Unless it's another one of those disguises that our light brown hare friend has donned!" Babs then looked again at the scene where Buster spun her around. She noticed something she hadn't noticed before: a big blue rabbit's foot had gotten into Buster's way. Buster had tripped over it, and found himself lost in the mob of lobsters. He didn't even see Babs fall into the punch carrier! "So Buster was telling the truth all along!" Babs concluded, "That means whoever that light brown hare is, who's responsible for this, gave me the shove!" she concluded. Suddenly, a carrot cake appeared before Babs. Just as she was about to eat it, she looked up, and saw Radley Rabbit. "You!" Babs cried. She recognized his fur, he was the light brown hare. "You ruined my date with Buster!" "I did it for you, Babs," Radley said, holding his arms out. "How dare you!" "Anything to have you for a girlfriend," Radley added, forcing himself upon her. "You'll never have me as a girlfriend!" Babs shouted, "I'm going to tell Buster Bunny the truth, and you're gonna be sorry!" She started to walk away, but Radley grabbed both her shoulders and blocked her way. "The only thing you're going to tell him is that you have a new boyfriend now!" "I don't want a new boyfriend!" Babs said, "I want you to get out of my way! You've just messed with the wrong hare, and you're gonna regret it!" Babs shouted. "Oh no!" Radley hissed, "You're coming with me, to Las Vegas, the place for gambling, the place of romance, the place of night life!" "I thought you always did right!" "On the occasion of correcting people's actions," Radley admitted, "Not my own!" "Oh, how ironic!" Radley tried to kiss Babs, but Babs had her own secret weapon. A glove accordion popped out of her chest and smacked Radley in the stomach, knocking him out cold. "Keep your hands off the body!" Babs shouted. Then, she pulled down a new background, where Buster was standing on the edge of a cliff. "Oh no!" thought Babs, "It's worse than I thought! He's going to throw himself out of the picture, again!" Buster didn't know that Babs was behind him, and he didn't care. He had ruined everything, and there was nothing left of his life to live. "Goodbye, cruel world," he said. He then prepared himself to jump into space. Suddenly, he heard... "Buster!" "Babs? You came back. I thought you didn't wanna talk to me again," Buster stammered. "Why wouldn't I?" Babs asked. "Because this date was a disaster. And you're right, it is my fault." "I take it back," Babs apologized for blaming Buster, "There's something you should know." Then she told Buster everything she had figured out. "Radley!" Buster jumped to attention, angry and furious, "So he is behind all this! I should have known. I oughta..." Buster had completely lost control of himself. Quickly, Babs grabbed a bucket of water and splashed it over Buster. "Thanks," Buster sighed, "I needed that." "That's two splashes for you, Buster!" Babs announced, as if she were a judge at a contest for Big Splashes. "And one for little ol' me!" "But Babs," Buster started, "that was..." "Unintentional," Babs finished the sentence for him. "You mean, you believe me?" Buster asked. "Of course I do," Babs said. "What are friends for?" Actually, that was Babs' way of saying that she was sorry for accusing Buster of wanting to splash her. "Anyway, Buster," Babs asked, "I believe that it is now time to party..." "Buster and Babs-style!" they both said together. With that, they pulled back the background where Radley had recovered. "Can't I ever separate the two of you!" Radley groaned. "Not in a lifetime," Babs answered. "Think of it this way," Buster said, "There's lots of good fish in the sea!" "Fish?" asked Radley, "Where?" There was no sea in front of him. Buster and Babs grinned. This was their moment. They pulled back the cliff background and made absolutely sure that Radley was on the edge. Radley looked down, and realized he was in trouble. He turned to Buster, waved sheepishly, then plunged into the water below. "Help! Help! Help!" Radley shouted. "Do ya think we oughta call 9-1-1?" Babs asked. "Yeah," Buster agreed, "Much, much later!" Suddenly, police sirens were screaming. Policemen jumped out of the cars, fished Radley out of the water, and placed handcuffs on him. "You are under arrest," said the chief policemen, "For stealing a taxi cab, tying up the control managers at Fun Fair, impersonating a car lot owner, and bumping off our officer!" "Wait!" Radley screamed, "There's some misunderstanding! I had a reason: I had to claim an actress!" "That 'actress' has a right to chose who she wants as her boyfriend," said the officer. "You can't do this to me!" Radley said, "I'll sue you! This is an outrageous act of injustice!" "Hold that tongue," said the officer, "Consider yourself lucky. I'm giving you a lighter sentence than what you would normally get!" "Oh, what's that?" asked Radley. * * * * * * Later, the mighty GIGANTIC, the most massive ship ever built, was making her course across the sea, carrying its passengers. Amongst these passengers were Buster and Babs Bunny. Buster, holding Babs in his arms, glanced out at the ocean. Babs sighed, "This has been one great date!" "Yeah, you said it!" Buster agreed. "Hey," Babs said, "I thought you said you needed to make it better!" "I take it back. There's something you should know," said Buster, and he kissed her. Below, Radley grumbled angrily as he shoveled the coal into the fire, "I hate that rabbit!" "You're tellin' me!" said another worker, Yosemite Sam. THAT'S ALL FOLKS! Fanfic © 1999 Jon Turner Tiny Toon Adventures characters are trademarks and copyrighted possessions of Time Warner, Inc. Tagline:Buster and Babs: Alooooooooha!