TINY TOON ADVENTURES BABSIE ON BOARD (June 6, 1993) Copyright 1992, 1993 by The Association of Amateur Alt.Tv.Tiny-Toon Net.Writers. No part of this document may be copied, transcribed, produced or animated, in whole or in part, without the written consent of the writers mentioned above. In fact, you should be pretty darn grateful that we're even letting you READ it! Written by: Sean Brandenburg (sean@agt.net) Christina M. Callihan (c-chan@mcl.ucsb.edu) Julian Fong (fong_jh@jhunix.hcf.jhu.edu) Marc Hart (iaexp000@blurt.oswego.edu) Julie Hazeltine (v050lp7c@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu) David Hungerford (audmh@asuvm.inre.asu.edu) Robert Jung (rjung@netcom.com) Kevin J. Podsiadlik (hampton@ais.org) Don Weatherwax (76635.2734@compuserve.com) Story editor: Sean Brandenburg ******************************************************************************** CAST LIST ANGELIC CHOIR (voiceover only) ARNOLD BABS BABS'S MOTHER BUSTER HAMTON DAVID LETTERMAN (no lines) MONTANA MAX (no lines) MORTIMER (no lines) NARRATOR (voiceover only) PLUCKY PAUL SCHAFFER (no lines) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ACT I FADE IN: INT. BABS'S BEDROOM - AFTERNOON PUSH IN ON BABS, who is lying casually on her bed. She is talking on the TELEPHONE and gesturing casually with her right hand. In her RIGHT HAND she holds a LEARNER'S PERMIT. BABS ...Yeah, Harriet, I finally got my learner's permit. I'm soooo excited! No more walking, no more buses... Now I can get some wheels and really go places! Babs pauses and looks at the permit. ON LEARNER'S PERMIT. The permit consists of two side-by-side PHOTOGRAPHS beneath which is a NAME. The photographs are full-profile and full-frontal shots (in the style of a police mug shot) of an out-of-focus monster. The name reads "Babra Anne Bnny". BABS (CONT) (VO) 'Cept I've seen better pictures from the Hubble telescope. BABS'S MOM (OS) Babs, hon, are you ready? Mortimer and I are waiting. ON BABS. She glances off-screen with a look of annoyance. BABS (to Harriet) What? Oh, they said I gotta (SARCASM) practice how to drive first, so I'm driving Mom to the store. What a waste of time. I mean, how hard can driving be? You point the car and floor it! BABS'S MOM (OS) Babs! Please hurry up. BABS I gotta go now, Harriet. I'll let you know how it goes. Byeeeeee! Babs dashes OUT OF FRAME, leaving a BABS-SHAPED CLOUD behind. The telephone receiver drops into the hand of the cloud, who places it on the hook and fades away. EXT. OUTSIDE BABS'S BURROW - AFTERNOON ON BURROW. BABS jumps out of her BURROW hole and poses. She is wearing an English driving outfit, complete with DRIVING HELMET, GOGGLES, MUFFLER, and GLOVES. BABS (Vanderbunny accent) Oh, I say! What marvelous weather for a motor through the countryside. Absolutely smashing! Now where did Jeeves park my motorcar? PAN LEFT to show the family CAR parked behind and to the left of Babs. The car is a sleek, red, LAMBORGHINI, illuminated by a HEAVENLY LIGHT. ANGELIC CHORUS (OS) (sung) Hallelujah! REVERSE ANGLE ON BABS, who clasps her hands together and lays her cheek on her hands. BABS (Long, contented sigh) REVERSE ANGLE ON CAR. The heavenly light vanishes and the Lamborghini shimmers away to reveal a drab, yellow K-CAR. Stuck to the rear window with four suction cups is a TRESS MACNEILLE doll. The LICENSE PLATE reads "A.T.T-T". Babs leaps INTO FRAME, wearing her REGULAR CLOTHES. Babs opens the car door, then looks AT CAMERA. BABS Well, I can dream, can't I? INT. INSIDE CAR - AFTERNOON VIEW INTO CAR THROUGH WINDSHIELD - SLIGHT DOWNSHOT. In the front passenger's seat is BABS'S MOM, whose face is always hidden behind the SUN VISOR. In the back seat, seen from between the front seats, is MORTIMER. Babs's mom is wearing her SEAT BELT, and Mortimer is seated in a CHILD SAFETY SEAT. Babs climbs in, slams the door, and puts on her SEAT BELT. BABS'S MOM (VO) Now, Babs, do you know what to do? BABS'S MOM'S POV DOWNSHOT ON BABS. Babs looks AT CAMERA. BABS Of course, Mom! No sweat! Babs faces forward. BABS (CONT) (impersonating Julia Child) First, we apply zee accelerator. Hm. No -- excuse me; first we put zee car in gear; (FAILS TO PUT CAR IN GEAR) Oh -- pardon; first we insert ze key, like so. (BABS INSERTS CAR KEYS) zen we turn ze key; (TURNS KEY, STARTING ENGINE) zen we apply zee accelerator. (ENGINE RACES AND KEEPS RACING) Oh -- of course. We must put it in gear... Babs is still pressing the accelerator to the floor, RACING the engine. We see her hand reach for the gearshift. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR - AFTERNOON ON CAR. The car, which has been quivering as the engine races, lurches back onto its rear wheels and then quickly speeds forward OUT OF FRAME with a loud SQUEALING of tires, leaving behind a thick cloud of exhaust. INT. INSIDE CAR - AFTERNOON BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. The scenery outside the car begins to zoom past at breakneck speed. Everything outside the windshield begins to take on a BLUISH TINGE. ON BABS and BABS'S MOM. Babs is driving confidently. BABS Gosh, this is easy! Babs turns to face her mother. BABS (CONT) I told you I didn't need practice! BABS'S MOM (VO) There's a stop sign coming up, dear. BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. A distant STOP SIGN rapidly approaches the car. REVERSE ANGLE TO BABS'S FACE, which has a look of panic. ON BABS'S FOOT. Babs stomps on the BRAKE PEDAL. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON DRIVER'S SIDE OF CAR. As the car screeches abruptly to a stop, through the DRIVER'S-SIDE FRONT WINDOW we can see Babs and Babs's Mom leaning forward in their seats but held back by their seat belts. Through the DRIVER'S-SIDE REAR WINDOW we see Mortimer's SAFETY SEAT shoot forward, as if it were on rubber bands, but still attached to the REAR SEAT BELT. The safety seat stops moving forward and hangs suspended in mid-air in front of the REAR-VIEW MIRROR. Mortimer grabs the mirror with both hands. The car stops with a loud SCREECH. Mortimer looks at camera with a look of CONFUSION. He releases the mirror and remains suspended for a moment. The safety seat flies backwards and hits the REAR SEAT with a loud "WHAM!". INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON REAR SEAT. Mortimer and the safety seat are imbedded in the rear seat, with only Mortimer's FEET showing, wiggling slightly. EXT. STREET OUTSIDE 'TWENTY-FOUR CARROTS' GROCERY STORE - AFTERNOON This is a TWO-WAY STREET with the STORE on the right-hand side. The street is lined with PARKED CARS on both sides. This street is the stem of a T-JUNCTION which can be seen in the distance. At the end of the street is a PARK which has several large PINE TREES. There is one PARKING SPACE open on the right-hand side of the street, conveniently situated directly in front of the store. There is a FIRE HYDRANT on the sidewalk beside the open parking space. BABS'S CAR drives INTO FRAME on the right-hand side of the road. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON BABS AND BABS'S MOM. Babs is searching for a parking place. BABS'S MOM (VO) Okay, Babs, we're here. Now find a place to park. BABS (pointing to her right) How about over there? BABS'S MOM (VO) Parallel parking is tricky, dear. Maybe we should find a parking lot. BABS No way! I've seen this done a million times. How hard can it be? ---> A THOUGHT BALLOON appears above Babs's head. ZOOM IN ON THOUGHT BALLOON. The thought balloon contains a large, leather-bound BOOK. The title is in Old English lettering and reads THE CAREFUL DRIVER'S GUIDE TO THE ROAD. Soft MUSIC-BOX MUSIC plays. Birds TWITTER. NARRATOR (OS) (mellifluous storybook voice) The Careful Driver's Guide to the Road. The book slowly opens to chapter twelve as the narrator continues. NARRATOR (CONT) (OS) Chapter Twelve: Parallel Parking. DRIFT IN ON DIAGRAM IN BOOK. The diagram becomes more and more complicated as the voice proceeds. NARRATOR (CONT) (OS) First, stop just past the space so that your rear bumper is even with the rear bumper of the car next to you. (VOICE PICKING UP SPEED) Next, turn your wheel all the way to the right and shift into reverse. Check if anyone is coming up behind you. (FASTER AND FASTER) Then back up approximately one-third car length and stop, reversing your wheel all the way in the other direction so that your right rear wheel just kisses the curb and your car's front bumper rotates into the space just missing the rear bumper of the car ahead of you adjust for position until you are equidistant from the vehicles on either side and come to a complete stop if you are more than a foot from the curb turn your wheel from side to side and go back and forth and back and forth and back and forth until you are within the maximum allowable distance for your jurisdiction! The THOUGHT BALLOON evaporates, <--- ON BABS, who is smiling peacefully. BABS No problem. Easy as pie. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON CAR, which is next to the parking space. Babs pulls the car forward until it is even with the car in front of the parking space. BABS (OS) Okay, first: rear bumpers even. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON BABS, whose brow is furrowed in concentration. BABS Next, shift car into reverse and turn all the way to the left. Babs shifts the car into reverse and turns the wheel to the left. BABS (CONT) No, right. Babs turns the wheel to the right. BABS (CONT) Or was it left? No, it was right. Okay, now check the mirror. Babs adjusts her MIRROR and does an AGHAST TAKE at it. ON REAR-VIEW MIRROR. A DIESEL LOCOMOTIVE is bearing down on Babs's car from behind. A muted TRAIN HORN sounds. ON BABS, who understandably panicks. BABS AAAAAAAAAAHH!! ON GAS PEDAL. Babs STOMPS on the gas pedal. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON CAR. The car BURNS RUBBER as it SQUIRMS around in a tight backwards arc, spinning perfectly into the space. It ends up facing the WRONG DIRECTION. A split second later, a huge train RUMBLES past at high speed in the lane the car formerly occupied. Its HORN sounds dully. In a second or two it is past. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON BABS'S MOM, whose face remains hidden behind the sun visor. BABS'S MOM (VO) That was very good for a first try, dear. Now be a good bunny and watch Mortimer for me. I'll only be a few minutes. Babs's mom leaves the car. As she slams her door, PAN TO BABS. Babs is frozen in a rictus of terror, hands locked around the steering wheel, teeth gritted. Mortimer CLAPS from the back seat. Babs shivers, covers her face with her hands and GROANS. BABS (VO) What a day. What else could go wrong? ARNOLD (OS) Vhat is dis!?? As Babs looks to her left, PAN RIGHT to include ARNOLD, who is standing outside the car and looking in the DRIVER'S-SIDE WINDOW. Beside Arnold is the FIRE HYDRANT. ARNOLD is wearing a police officer uniform, complete with SUNGLASSES, TICKET PAD, and an "AAPD" SHOULDER PATCH. BABS (TO CAMERA) I had to ask. BABS (CONT) (TO ARNOLD) Yes, Officer? ARNOLD Hear me now you poor excuse for a pink bunny rabbit. You are parked next to this fire hydrant! Move dis vehicle now or go to jail later! BABS Fire hydrant? The fire hydrant GLEAMS in the sun. BABS (flustered) But...but....I just parked.... I can't dr......my mother is.... ARNOLD Listen to me now and understand me later. Move dis vehicle or get a TICKET!!!!! EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON ARNOLD. Arnold pulls out his NIGHTSTICK and slams it into the side of the car, with sufficient force to drive it out of the parking spot. OVERHEAD SHOT OF CAR. The car spins several times and ends up on the far side of the road, facing the proper direction. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON BABS. BABS No problem, Mortimer. We'll just drive around the block until Mom is finished. BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. Babs drives a short ways and stops at a red light. BUSTER, PLUCKY, and HAMTON are standing on the sidewalk. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON BUSTER, PLUCKY, AND HAMTON, who are waiting to cross the street. Plucky points toward Babs's car. PLUCKY Hey guys, look, it's Babs! FOLLOW THE TRIO as they run to the car. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON FRONT SEAT. Babs tries to look cool and in control as Buster leans in the FRONT PASSENGER'S WINDOW. BUSTER Hiya, Babsie. How about a lift? BABS Well, actually Buster, I have to... BUSTER Great! Come on, guys! PULL BACK so the entire interior of the car is seen. BUSTER climbs into the FRONT SEAT. PLUCKY and HAMTON get in the BACK with Mortimer. Plucky is on the PASSENGER'S SIDE, Hamton on the DRIVER'S SIDE. Mortimer is in the MIDDLE. Mortimer glances at the new passengers and WAVES. ON BABS. Babs turns and looks into the back seat. BABS (VO) Guys, I don't think... ON PLUCKY. PLUCKY I didn't even know you could drive, Babs. You must be pretty good if your Mom lets you drive the car alone. REVERSE ANGLE ON BABS. BABS Actually, Plucky, she didn't... ON HAMTON. HAMTON (interrupting) Yeah. _Incredibly_ good! REVERSE ANGLE ON BABS. BABS (preening) Well, yeah. Good? I'm grrrrrreat! CLOSE-UP OF BABS'S FACE. A somewhat PSYCHOTIC SMILE slowly crosses Babs's face. BABS Hang on and I'll show you some REAL driving! EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON TRAFFIC LIGHT. The light turns GREEN. ON REAR OF CAR. The car shudders and takes off at light speed. Almost immediately it vanishes into the distance. FOLLOW THE CAR FROM OVERHEAD. The scenery flashes by on either side of the car. ZOOM IN ON CAR UNTIL WE ARE LOOKING INTO THE WINDSHIELD. BABS has a MANIC GRIN on her face. BUSTER, PLUCKY, and HAMTON are looking QUEASY. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON BABS AND BUSTER. Babs glances at Buster and notices his discomfort. BABS Hey, what's with you guys? Isn't this FUN? BUSTER Oh yeah, just... Babs CUTS OFF a car, which BLARES its horn. Buster cringes. BUSTER (CONT) ...just PEACHY! ON HAMTON. HAMTON (timidly) Babs, don't you think you should slow down a little? ON BABS. BABS Aww, don't be a wet blanket, Hammy! I've got everything under control! ---> Babs screams around a turn! SEATBELTS STRETCH as Buster and Plucky are thrown against their doors and Hamton and Mortimer are thrown into Plucky. *SQUOOSH!* ON SQUISHED PLUCKY. PLUCKY Oh, sure, nooo problem! I was planning to get liposuction anyway. <--- ON BABS. Babs looks at her passengers. BABS Geez, you three sure are tense! Babs glances at the CAR STEREO. BABS (CONT) Maybe some tunes will loosen you up! ---> PLUCKY (OS) If I get any looser, I'm gonna need some... ON BUSTER. BUSTER (brightly) Duct tape? ON BUSTER AND PLUCKY. Plucky leans forward towards Buster. PLUCKY (aside to Buster) Gimme a break, Buster, I've got only so many lines in this script. <--- ON BABS. Babs looks down at the TAPE HOLDER between her and Buster. She pops it open and begins rummaging through it, naturally paying no attention to the road. BABS (VO) Let's see.... Madonna? No.... Hammer? Naaaahhhhh.... The MILLS BROTHERS?! How did _that_ get in here? ON BUSTER AND BABS. Buster looks down at Babs. BUSTER Uh, Babs...maybe I should do that. BABS (VO) No sweat, Buster, almost done.... BUSTER'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. The car swerves mindlessly into the RIGHT-HAND LANE. A large FREEWAY ENTRANCE sign appears: +----------------------------------+-------------+ | | SPEEDWAY | | /\ SAFE AND SANE | OF DEATH | | |\/ / STREETS | +--+ | | | / | _| |_ | | |__\ | \ / | | | \ / | |__________________________________|_____\/______| The car passes under the sign, still in the right-hand lane. ---> A small booth FLASHES past on the right-hand side of the road. Sitting at the booth is MONTANA MAX. The sign above the booth reads "ACME LIFE INSURANCE -- 5 cents". A sign on the front of the booth reads "The insurance agent is IN." <--- REVERSE ANGLE ON BABS AND BUSTER. Babs's head is still below the dash. Plucky leans INTO FRAME. PLUCKY Babs... oh, Babsie-boo, a moment if you please.... BABS (VO) Don't get your tailfeathers in a twist, Plucky, I'll find something you like! Hamton leans INTO FRAME. HAMTON But Babs... BABS (VO) Sorry, Hamton, I'm NOT playing the Mills Brothers. BUSTER (losing it) BARBARA ANNE BUNNY!!!! Babs's head jerks up. BABS DON'T CALL ME THAT!!!! BUSTER, HAMTON AND PLUCKY (in unison) YOU'RE HEADED ONTO THE _FREEWAY_!!! BABS I'm _what_?! BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. We see an overwhelming number of cars rushing around the car at extremely high speeds. The two sides of the eight-lane freeway are separated by nothing more than a STRIP OF PAINT. On each side of each road is a high concrete barrier. A CLOVERLEAF in the distance crawls with even more cars, all traveling at supersonic speeds. FADE OUT END OF ACT I ACT II EXT. FREEWAY -- AFTERNOON HIGH OVERHEAD SHOT OF CLOVERLEAF. Cars rush madly through the clover leaf. The camera pans along the highway until it reaches a FREEWAY ACCESS RAMP. The camera zooms in on BABS'S CAR which is approaching the highway via this ramp, and then zooms in through the windshield. INT. INSIDE CAR - AFTERNOON ON BABS. Babs is breathing heavily and trying to keep her sanity. BABS Ok... I think I remember reading about freeway driving..... Plucky leans INTO FRAME. PLUCKY (hysterically) You planned this, right Babs? Tell me you know what you're doing. Several horns BLARE as Babs enters the freeway proper. Amazingly, she merges without hitting anything. Plucky glances out the window and then back at Babs. PLUCKY (even more hysterically) _Please_ tell me you know what you're doing! ON BABS AND BUSTER. Buster is looking at Babs with a worried expression on his face. BABS Uh, sure. Of course I know what I'm doing. All I have to do is survive until the next exit (BABS LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY). And make my way back to the store. (MORE LAUGHTER) Simple enough. (BABS COMPLETELY BREAKS DOWN.) Buster shakes Babs. BUSTER Babs! Snap out of it! BABS (still dazed) Huh? What? Sure, Buster, no problem. Everything's under control. BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. The car careens wildly across all four lanes of traffic, across the median, and onto the other side of the road. ---> A gigantic MOVING VAN driven by DAVID LETTERMAN with PAUL SCHAFFER riding shotgun bears down on the car, horn blaring. CAMERA FOLLOWS THE VAN as Babs, startled into action, cranks the wheel to her right. As the van passes on the driver's side of the car we see painted on its side: LATE NIGHT MOVING COMPANY CBS OR BUST! <--- BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. Babs is swerving through the oncoming traffic. Suddenly four cars driving abreast appear, leaving Babs no way to manoeuver around them. ALL AIIEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIEEEE!!!!!! Babs SPINS the wheel to the left, which places the concrete wall directly in front of them. The wall quickly rushes towards them. As the car is about to hit the wall, the camera REVERSES ANGLE ON PASSENGERS. LEFT-TO-RIGHT PAN ACROSS PASSENGERS. Hamton and Plucky are clutching the sides of the CAR SEAT, eyes tightly shut. Mortimer looks quite sleepy. Buster is covering his eyes. Babs is calmly driving. ON BUSTER AND BABS. Buster peeks through his fingers. BUSTER Are we still alive? Babs looks at Buster with a slightly peeved expression. BABS Well, naturally! EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON CAR. The car is driving along the VERTICAL WALL of the freeway. The rest of the traffic is confined to the more conventional roadway. PLUCKY (OS) Does Ralph Nader know about this feature? BABS (OS) Relax, Plucky! At least now we won't have any problems with... Just then, an oncoming car, also driving on the wall, appears with horn blaring. Babs's car just swerves out of the way in time. BABS (OS) (shouting) Crazy driver!! The swerve takes the car to the top of the wall, so that its tires and more than half its body hangs above the top of the wall. Gravity sees an opening to reassert itself. The car falls over the wall and vanishes. ON CAR. The car tumbles side-over-side and lands squarely, but none-too-gently, right-side-up on a deserted road. BUSTER (OS) Where are we? INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON PLUCKY. PLUCKY (sarcastically) Well, O Great Driver? ON BABS. BABS (with false bravado) Don't worry, everything's under control. ON PLUCKY. Plucky crosses his arms and slumps down in his seat. PLUCKY Ohhh, suuuure it is. ON BUSTER AND BABS. BABS (in an urgent whisper) Buster, get the map out of the glove box and _find us_. BUSTER Gotcha, Babs. Buster reaches below the dash and produces a MAP, which he very quickly unfolds. ON MAP. The map is insanely complicated. WIDER. Hamton leans INTO FRAME. HAMTON Gee, Buster, have you figured out where we are yet? BUSTER (tightly) Nope. WIDER. PLUCKY leans INTO FRAME. PLUCKY Here, let me see. We ducks are natural navigators. Some DIVIDERS, a SEXTANT, and a MAGNIFYING GLASS are produced. Hamton starts shooting star sights. Plucky messes with the dividers while Buster peers through the magnifying glass at the map. HAMTON Aha! Thirty-five degrees, five minutes north latitude, one-hundred- six degrees, thirty-nine minutes west longitude. WIDEN TO INCLUDE BABS. Babs rolls her eyes. BABS (exasperated) Oh, that helps a lot! Here, let me see that. Babs turns to look at the map. BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. A SIGN reading "ACME ACRES, NEXT RIGHT" flashes by, unnoticed. The map unfolds further to completely cover the windshield. EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON WINDSHIELD. All that can be seen is the back of the map. Four gesturing SILHOUETTES can be seen through the map. PLUCKY (VO) Oh, Babsie-poo. BABS (VO) I'm busy, Plucky. PLUCKY (VO) Who, pray tell, is driving? There is a short pause. Suddenly, four pairs of hands pull the map down from the windshield. ALL AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON BABS'S POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD -- SLIGHT UPSHOT. Almost immediately ahead on the road is a WOODEN BARRICADE with two SIGNS; They read "DANGER---BRIDGE OUT" and "HAVE A NICE PLUMMET". EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON FAR SHOT OF BARRICADE. The car BURSTS through the barricade and gracefully drives off the end of the road. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON PLUCKY. Plucky rolls down his window. PLUCKY Women and waterfowl first!!! Plucky dives out of his window. EXT. IN THE AIR ON PLUCKY. PLUCKY (to camera) Hey, what can I say? Survival of the tooniest! Plucky flies LEFT OUT OF FRAME. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON ON OCCUPANTS. BUSTER and BABS are clinging to each other, starting straight ahead. HAMTON is fervently praying. MORTIMER is asleep. BUSTER AND BABS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! EXT. A STREET IN ACME ACRES -- AFTERNOON ON STREET. There are TELEPHONE WIRES along the street. The car falls INTO FRAME and lands directly on the telephone wires. The telephone poles BEND INWARD as the wires stretch. As the car wheels touch the pavement, the poles snap back into position, FLINGING the car backwards LEFT OUT OF FRAME. EXT. IN THE AIR -- AFTERNOON PLUCKY is casually flying. The CAR arcs backwards INTO FRAME behind Plucky. Plucky glances behind him and does an AGHAST TAKE as the car SMASHES into him, plastering him against the ROOF. The car and Plucky continue to ARC LEFT OUT OF FRAME. PLUCKY'S POV. Looking through Plucky's eyes, we can see his body mashed against the roof of the car. As the car rises through the air we see BIRDS and CLOUDS do DOUBLE TAKES and then quickly dash out of the way. The GROUND moves slowly in front of Plucky and the car, indicating that the car has reached the top of the arc and had begun to fall ROOF FIRST. ACME ACRES is spread out below and approaches quickly. As the car falls, it travels along a straight street. This is the same street that the GROCERY STORE is on. The "TWENTY-FOUR CARROTS" grocery store PASSES on the RIGHT. We are headed directly towards the PINE TREE in the PARK at the "T" junction at the end of the street. The tree approaches at breakneck speed and we hit it with a CRASH. EXT. THE PARK -- AFTERNOON. ON TREE. The TREE has been BENT by the force of the collision. The TOP of the tree is touching the GROUND. The CAR is UPSIDE-DOWN, resting on the top of the tree. PLUCKY is PINNED between the car and the tree. One of his ARMS is visible and limp. INT. INSIDE UPSIDE-DOWN CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON OCCUPANTS. BUSTER shakily disentangles himself from BABS, unbuckles his seatbelt and drops out of the seat. HAMTON does likewise. BUSTER (sarcastically) Oh, what a GREAT parking place, Babs. I NEVER would have thought of using the top of a tree. Do me a favour--the next time I ask you a ride, just drive away. (sighs) At least this day can't get any worse. Let's go, Hamton. HAMTON (dazed) Uhhh, thanks for the ride, Babs. Buster and Hamton open their doors. BABS No! Wait! Don't get out! EXT. OUTSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON TREE. BUSTER and HAMTON drop to the ground. The loss of the weight causes the tree to SPRING back, catapulting the car OUT OF FRAME. PLUCKY remains stuck to the tree and is SMASHED into the ground as the top of the tree hits the ground. The tree FLIPS back and smashes Buster and Hamton into the ground. The tree continues to flip back and forth, hitting Plucky on one side and Buster and Hamton on the other. CUT TO CAR. FOLLOW CAR as it flies through the air. The arc of the car causes it to turn right side up at the apex. The car falls and makes a perfect four-point landing on the street. The car rolls to a stop outside the GROCERY STORE. INT. INSIDE CAR -- AFTERNOON. ON BABS. Babs is sitting upright in her seat, looking straight ahead with a stunned expression on her face. She is holding the wheel with a death grip. WIDEN. BABS'S MOM opens the passenger door and gets in. BABS'S MOM Oh, good, you turned the car around. Now let's go home, Babs. BABS (speaking slowly and without moving, using her stick-in- the-mud voice from "Senserely Yours") Home? Oh, sure, home. No problem. BABS'S MOM Are you okay, Babs? BABS (still speaking slowly and without moving) I'm perfectly fine. Why do you ask? ARNOLD (OS) Stop right there, little pink girly- type bunny. WIDEN. Babs looks silently out the window to see ARNOLD THE POLICEMAN ARNOLD |............DIALOGUE..............| You are charged with turning WRONG at a RIGHT turn only intersection, breaking the law of gravity, and excessive use of violent sight gags. Give me your license. Babs slowly hands her LEARNER'S PERMIT to Arnold, who looks at it, tears it up, and hands it back to her. BABS Don't say it... ARNOLD Hasta la vista... Babsie. Babs groans and collapses forward, her head hitting the horn. As the horn blares, the camera IRISES OUT. THE END ******************************************************************************